The Right Girl

By Paula Austin

     The night was damp and cool as Sandra stepped out from the entrance of the cave that served as her new home. Pulling her jacket tighter around her she cautiously traversed the dark path leading away from the base camp. After some distance she came up on a large, flat boulder and sat down. Despite the cool air it was still warm from the days sun.

She had been unable to sleep so she had come out into the night air to find the solitude she was never afforded in the cramped confines of Alpha. As she reclined on the rock she relaxed slightly and began to study the night sky. It was very dark and abundant with stars. She picked out unnamed and alien constellations drawing mental maps and wishing they had time to name them. Perhaps one day when they did not had to expend every ounce of energy on their survival, she thought.

She still had not embraced the idea of spending the rest of her life on this alien planet. The thought of never seeing her family or home world again had been foremost in her thoughts recently. There was even a sense of guilt for leaving the moon, even though the commander had pointed out to her it was the only hope for the survival of their population. She often asked herself why she had been chosen to survive when so many of her friends and colleagues had perished on the runaway moon. Many of the much more productive members of their community she felt. Why her?

Hearing footsteps on the path behind her, she sat up and looked around. She was relieved to see Alan Carter come up the path. She was always glad to have Alan around. Through the years he had been her best friend and confessor. He had offered his shoulder to her when a freak eagle accident to Paul Marrow, her lover. He had stayed by her side for days helping her cope with the loss. She felt most comfortable because he accepted her as she was and seemed to genuinely enjoy her platonic companionship. He understood her reluctance to leave the moon.

     “I though it was you I saw heading up here.” He sat down on the boulder next to her.

     “I had trouble sleeping and did not want to disturb anyone. How was your trip?” She asked. Alan had spent the past several days ferrying Maya and Tony over the planet surface collecting data.

     “Good actually, we found a fairly large ore deposit not far from here. Not too deep either.” He sounded tired.

     “The commander will be glad to hear that. I guess you’ll be heading out again soon?”

     “No, I think I’ll let Bill take the next one. Been quiet around here?”

     “Fairly. They discovered some type of giant insect. Helena thinks it could potentially be harvested as a source of protein.” She made a face of disgust.

     “Ummm, sounds very appetizing.”

     “There have been a few weddings since you left.  Everyone is starting to talk about having families.”

     “It’s the planet, it’s given them some hope. How about you? Any proposals from the young bachelors?” He picked up a pebble from the ground and began rolling it around in his hands.

     “No. I suppose I will never marry. Who would want me?” she pulled her jacket tighter against the night air. “You may end up the same way if unless you can decide on one girl.”

     “Perhaps I play the field so much because I’m waiting until the right girl is ready. I’m not good at rejection, you know.” He stared nervously at the ground.

      She regarded him for a moment startled by this revelation. “Whoever she is, she is very lucky and I hope she knows it.”

“Yeah.” Alan stood up and stretched. “Well, I’ll be turning in now. Walk you back?”

     “No, thanks. I want to sit here a little longer.”

     “Okay. ‘Night.” He bent over ad kissed her on the cheek before returning back down the path.

     As she watched him leave she felt her heart sink. She had never considered that one day he might find someone and marry. She had come to depend on his companionship so much. She drew such comfort from his company that the thought that he might not be there one day filled her with remorse. She got up and started back down the path no longer feeling the need for solitude.

     It had been a long process to get Medical Center’s database back up and running once they were on the planet. The urgency to execute Operation Exodus had spurred them to expedite the dismantling and storage of vital diagnostic equipment. Thus, when it arrived planet side in was in no particular order or even labeled correctly. It had taken Sandra weeks to sort it out and get it online. Finally, the job was near completion.

      Sandra sat back in her chair and studied the schematic in her lap. It was very important that she not overlook any thing. There were very few replacements and she couldn’t afford any silly mistakes. Stopping to rub her tired eyes. She sensed Helena sit down across from her. “You look tired.”

     “I did not sleep very well last night.” Sandra replied.

     Helena looked at her for a moment. “You’ve been working pretty hard lately. Maybe you should take a day or two off.”

     “I am almost finished here and there is much more that needs my attention.”

     “Yeah, we’ve all been putting in a lot of hours lately. It’s not easy starting over.” She walked over to a cooler and returned with two bottles of water. She handed one to Sandra. “So, what will you do now?”

     “That depends on the Commander and where I am needed.”

     “That’s not what I mean. Have you thought about marriage? That seems to be the primary topic these days.” 

      Sandra smiled. “That is something that requires two people. It is hard to think of marriage when you aren’t even dating.”

      Helena shrugged. “I don’t know, I always thought that you and Alan made a great pair.”

      “Alan?” Sandra shook her head. “Alan and I are just friends. He already mentioned he had someone in mind.”

       Helena chuckled softly and put her hand on Sandra’s arm. “Sahn, I happen to know that Alan is very fond of you. If I had to take a guess I would bet that the someone he is waiting on is you.”

      “That seems ridiculous. Anyway, I am not sure I will ever be ready to marry.” She attempted to study the schematic again.

      “Look, I know this really isn’t any of my business, but maybe it’s time you moved past Paul. I know you loved him, but you can’t dwell on what might have been.”

       Sandra set the schematics to the side. “I always thought that Paul and I would spend the rest of our lives together. So, do I just forget about him and start with someone else and a lie?”

      Helena seemed to struggle with indecision for a moment. “Sandra, I’m going to tell you something that I thought I never would. I don’t mean to tarnish Paul’s memory. He was a very good man, but he was anything but exclusive. He had a wife back on Earth. Of course it was a marriage of convenience. Her father was a very powerful man and she craved Paul’s attention. After the chains of matrimony started to threaten his happiness he applied for his post at Alpha. Her father saw it was not denied. She sat back and sighed. “Something else I never told anyone was what a mistake my first marriage was. Lee and I married for all the wrong reasons. I was still in Medical school and dating Lee when my father died. I was so distraught that I couldn’t make even the simplest arrangements. Lee flew out and took over everything and I depended on him. Two weeks later we were married. Well, the honeymoon didn’t last long. We soon found out were didn’t have that much in common. Only the physical attraction remained.  We drifted further and further apart and by the time he left on the Astro seven mission we were on the verge of divorce. Then I met John. We shared the same ideas and interests, but most of all I found that just being around him was a comfort. I can tell him anything and not be judged. Do you see what I’m saying?”

      Silent understanding drew across Sandra’s face. She nodded slightly. “Yes. I think I do.”

     As Sandra started to return to her ‘quarters’ she considered all Helena had said. She had leaned on Paul a lot after breakaway. Eventually the need for human companionship and warmth had led to a relationship of sorts. Just having someone to lie next to and feel close with eased the burden of survival. However, in retrospect, she now saw many inconsistencies. There were times she would run into Alan on the way to her shared quarters and he would whisk her away for a late snack explaining Paul was in a meeting or was tied up. Then later she would return to her quarters to find Paul asleep in their bed. Once or twice she even thought she had detected the faint scent of another woman’s perfume on the sheets. Sandra had a sudden dawning that Alan had been covering for Paul all that time and it made her ire rise. Anger was rising to the edge of tears as she adjusted her course and headed toward the staging area where she knew Alan would be supervising the storage of the containers being brought down from orbit. Clearing a small rise she saw her objective only yards away. She approached him wordlessly and as she drew up next to him he looked up and smiled.

     “Hi, Sahn. I was just…” The slap he hadn’t seen coming cut him off in mid sentence.

     Sandra regretted it almost as soon as she did it, but she couldn’t take it back. Nor would she if fate intervened and offered her a chance. The hurt was too real and the pain of his betrayal too sharp.

     “YOU KNEW!!” she screamed in his face, ignoring the look of bewilderment and the angry red patch on his face where she had assaulted him. “You knew and you never said a word about Paul and the other women. You kept me from finding out by conveniently running interference for him while he had his little trysts. You helped him. Tell me Alan, did it feel good to pretend to be my friend while you covered for his infidelities?”   Her anger spent, she sank to the ground sobbing.

     Alan squatted down and pulled her into his arms. He was relieved when she didn’t pull away. “It’s true, I knew, but it’s not what you think. Paul and I argued over it many times, but he told me to mind my business. He said wasn’t hurting anyone. I wanted to tell you but you seemed so fragile. I knew if I told you your heart would break and you might never trust another man again. I didn’t do it for Paul. I did it for more selfish reasons. . I couldn’t be the one to hurt you. I did it because I love you and I wanted you to love me back one day.” Neither said anything for several minutes. He stroked her hair soothingly as the sobs subsided. Alan was relieved that everyone in the staging area had cleared out to give them privacy. Finally Sandra looked up at him and her wiped the tears from her face.

     “I hurt you.” She said as she raised her palm to his cheek.

     “Not nearly as much as I’ve hurt you. I’m sorry, Sahn”

     “You love me?” she asked.

      He smiled broadly. In answer he lower his lips to hers.

      Sometime later, after Alan had led her away to their special boulder, Sandra lay in his arms kissing away the pain she had inflicted earlier.  He sighed and sat up pulling her across his lap so that she sat in front of him with his arms around her waist. He began to nibble at her neck and earlobes.

     “Alan, do you think there’s much hope for us here?” she said as she leaned back against him enjoying his caresses

     Inhaling her scent deeply he buried his face in her neck considering her question. Neither of them had been in favor of deserting Alpha for an uncertain future. But that was a moot point now, because here there were struggling for a foothold on this strange planet. “Well, love, I think we have a good chance. We have technology on our side and Maya is confident that our crops will flourish in this environment. It’s hard to say this, but I guess we have a better chance than we did.”

     “It was hard for me to leave the moon. As long as we were on the moon there was hope that we might find a way home to earth. Now, there is no hope.”

     “That’s not true. Some one once said that ‘where there’s life there’s hope’. Maybe it won’t be what we want, but I believe there is hope for life here. It may not be easy, but it’s something.”

     “Life, hope, families it all sounds so new. I haven’t heard those words for a very long time.”

     “Well get used to it love, you’ll be hearing it a lot from now on. Hey, I’m starved. Let’s get something to eat.”

      The cafeteria was clearing out as they entered hand in hand. The after duty dinner rush was over and the Alphan’s were heading back to their quarters to relax after a hard day. Several familiar faces were about though, as they passed John and Helena’s table Helena gave Sandra a wink and a knowing look. 

     “Well, what will it be? Protein soy turkey and dressing or vegetable stew?” The previous dinner rush had depleted the inventory.

     “Stew I think” the vegetables had been grown in hydroponics and freeze-dried. They lacked suitable texture but did have more flavor than the ration packs.

      Alan grabbed a couple of bowls and a couple of bottles of water and started over toward a side table. As he was about to put the bowls down John Koenig raised his hand and motioned them over. Alan cast a glance at Sandra who nodded and started over.

     “Good evening, John, Helena.” He said as he placed the dinner on the table and pulled Sandra’s chair out.

     “And I thought chivalry was dead.” Helena said as she cast a playful look in Koenigs direction.

     “I’m chivalrous!” John chortled. Helena merely smiled.

     Alan and Sandra watched the exchange and smiled. The one constant in the world was John and Helena. Their witnessing relationship was enough to give the most desperate soul hope.

     “Okay.” John jumped up on his chair and held up his hands, silencing the remaining diners. “I have an announcement to make!” When he had everyone’s attention he continued. “This afternoon, I asked for Dr Russell’s hand in marriage and she graciously accepted. Now I would like to propose a toast to my beautiful bride-to-be.” He leaned down and picked up his own bottle of water. “To the woman who gives my life meaning. May we have many years of happiness together.”  As applause erupted he took his seat again. “Hmmm,” he said as he leaned close to Helena “How’s that for chivalry?”

      Helena smiled lovingly and touched lips with him. “That wasn’t chivalry. That was bragging.”

      “I’ve got a lot to brag about.” He said as he got up and reached over to help her with her chair. He turned to Alan and slapped him on the back. “Jump on in, Alan. The water’s great.” He whispered in his friend’s ear as he started out behind Helena.

       Sandra and Alan sat in stunned silence for several seconds. Finally Alan looked at his companion. “Wow. That’s going to be one tough act to follow.”

       “I wouldn’t mind so much.” Sandra replied, picking at her stew.

       “Would you?” Alan leaned closer until their shoulders were touching.

       “Would I what?” she said barely suppressing a smile.

        Alan looked at her for a moment, and then shrugged his shoulders. “Okay, I’m only going to do this once.” He slid off his chair on to one knee. Taking one of her petite hands in his own he took a deep breath “Will you marry me?” It was at that very moment he realized his mistake. Peering over Sandra’s shoulder Tony Verdeschi and Bill Frasier stood grinning. Alan slipped back into his seat, his face a deepening crimson.

        Sandra also noticed their friends at that moment. She opened her mouth to reply then closed it again. She wondered what witty reply she could give that would lighten the moment.

       “Well?” Bill and Tony asked in unison.

        Seeing no way to preserve the dignity of the occasion, Sandra smiled. “Of course. And wouldn’t it be nice if Tony and Maya made it a double?”

        All eyes then turned to Tony. “Well?” they all queried in unison.
        Beads of sweat had popped out on the doomed mans forehead. “Uh, well… you see… I would, but uh, ….you see….” At that moment Maya appeared at Tony’s side.

       “What’s going on?” she asked while studying Tony’s pained expression.

       “Alan and Sahn just became engaged” Bill offered.

       “Oh! Wonderful!” she leaned down to hug Sandra. “What now?”

        Bill looked like the cat that ate the canary. “Now, we have a wedding.” He nudged Tony “Right, mate?”

        Once again, the cafeteria erupted in cheers. Sandra looked around the room at the smiling faces. Faces that three months ago were worn with exhaustion and despair. And she smiled.

March 18, 2000