| Quand l'écran s'allume Je tape sur mon clavier Tous les mots sans voix Qu'on se dit avec les doigts Et j'envoie dans la nuit Un message pour celle qui Me répondra OK pour un rendez-vous | When the screen lights up I type on my keyboard All those voiceless words We say with our fingers And I send into the night A message for the one who Will answer yes to a rendez-vous
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From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Brenda,
I know it has been a long time since I spoke to you, and that we didn't part on the best of terms. But having seen the announcement of your divorce on the bulletin board, I thought I should write and congratulate you. I imagine congratulations are in order.
I waited a few days before writing because we have had a minor crisis on our hands. Davey Kano and Sue Ellen Collins decided to hold their engagement party in a blizzard. Or at least they wandered off for some private time together and got lost in it. Fortunately, they have come back safe and sound.
I hope you are well. You must tell me what you are doing now.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Brenda,
I was so pleased to get your reply to my message. I was afraid you would still be angry with me (and indeed well you might).
Emiles family did not like the idea of divorce as they are very catholic but I think Michel understood that I couldnt continue to live with Emile now that he is with Pierrette.
Yes, it's all very well to defend the sanctity of marriage, but it ceases to make any sense if neither of the spouses is willing to pursue the relationship. I've seen how painful it can be for two people to try and live together when they can't stand the sight of each other. This is what happened to Layla and Blake and it's unrealistic to expect humans to overcome that level of antipathy. (This on the subject of divorce in general, since I realise things were less extreme between you and Emile. It is merely my opinion that the necessity for divorce in some cases should be accepted, but that even greater emphasis should be placed on preventing such unsuitable marriages in the first place. As you had described your situation to me, it seems the whole issue could have been avoided without Jean-Paul's intervention encouraging you to marry when you weren't ready.)
And I think Michel and Celestine really like Pierrette too and didnt want to hurt her feelings. She really is a nice girl and I think she does love Emile even if I cant understand why anymore.
I can't say I know Pierrette, but I remember her older sister Justine, who was at school with me when I was living on Alpha. Not that I have very distinct memories of her either. It's been a long time. But I do remember hearing Justine talking to her father in French, and being so very excited because I rarely heard anyone speaking my mother tongue. Layla and I were invited to see some French movies at the Daniels' when we were small. I think Jean-Paul must have been there too, because basically all the French-speaking children were invited.
to have joined a divorcees club with Nora Edelson who clings to me like a long lost relative as if us both getting rid of our husbands gave us something in common. We have nothing in common aside from that but she has been entertaining me with stories of what a horrible person her husband Lance was. It makes me think I was unfair to Emile!
I'm sure Emile was sufficiently unbearable for you. I think I know who Lance is but I don't remember what he was like. I think he was a good footballer but that obviously says nothing about what he'd be like as a husband. I don't know who Nora is at all. You must tell me more about her if you're sharing a flat with her.
to think about. Is Sue Ellen going out with Davey? Hes alot older than her
Since we already have a precedent of a man marrying a woman forty years younger, I'd say Davey doesn't need to worry about people complaining. Eight years isn't all that much. The problem is that Sue Ellen is very much a child. It doesn't matter what age she is, she runs after Davey wide-eyed just as she used to run after her big brothers in the fields. She wants someone to worship, not a husband (though I know many societies of the past would have said that wasn't a contradiction. Layla has found some « interesting » Christian and Muslim views about how women are children who should be subservient to their husbands as if they were fathers. I'd like to try that theory on Helena or Becky and see how long I survive !). But Sue Ellen is not my relative and she will be a legal adult (for wont of being a real one) in April. I would probably be less bothered if Becky wasn't constantly wringing her hands about this, and if I knew Davey was really in love with Sue Ellen and not just looking for a young, fertile womb to have children with. That probably sounds extreme, but I think it is suspicious that of all the single women who admire Davey he should choose the youngest and the one with the least personality. If Layla was his type of woman, I don't see how he can marry Sue Ellen except that perhaps she's less likely to leave him for someone else the way Layla did. I will stop talking on this topic. As I said, it is Becky's favourite subject of lamentation so I find myself giving it a lot more thought than I should !
I must close now, as I have to do some work. We have decided to close the base tomorrow, which means a big celebration we have to prepare today. You might be shocked, but last winter we ate some of the doves, so we'll be doing the same this time.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Brenda,
Your last message made me laugh. This Nora you're living with sounds like a real man eater ! Does she always lure men to your flat like that ?
brother is also not very successful. He has a daughter called Judith who lives with her mother but that was apparently a mistake and they never married
The Edelsons don't sound very lucky in love, but I doubt it's a hereditary thing. I'm glad you are having a good time with Nora and her brother. You didn't mention his name, is it Dominic? I'm sure he has some other girlfriend lined up by now if he's as « cute » as you say.
I didnt know she was nearly eighteen. I thought she was only fifteen
I now understand why you were concerned about the age difference. Yes, Sue Ellen is nearly eighteen so she will soon be able to marry anyone she likes even though to look at her and listen to her talk, you would think she was about twelve. Maybe Davey likes that sort of thing, who knows ? They are engaged but not getting married before September so maybe they will both come to their senses after all.
I havent heard from Rebecca for a long time. What is she doing now. Still going out with poor Jorge
It looks as though she might actually be marrying « poor Jorge » ! Your friend Dominic and his girlfriend aren't the only ones who failed to take advantage of Alpha's wide selection of contraceptives. Becky is expecting a child, due in August, and I gather she and Jorge are thinking about getting married before the child is born. They don't seem in a hurry, though. That all came as a big surprise to all of us. Not least Becky, I think.
busy. If you have time you must tell me about Layla, Astrid and everybody
I don't know how much information I can give you on « everybody », but I'll try and tell you what the others are doing. I don't know if you knew but Layla and Neil are expecting their second child. In fact, if I'm going to tell you about children, it might be faster to list who isn't expecting a child. There's me and Helena and that's about it ! I've never seen so many requests for new quarters.
Anyway, Layla is as she always is, except larger. My mother is fussing over her as she always does when one of my sisters is expecting. Layla is still the head of computing down here and she's also working in the Temple. Davey Kano seems keen to merge their two religious currents, so I'll be curious to see what comes of that. I don't think it will be very difficult to do since they both believe in very much the same basic things. Well, I'm sure you remember what I think of all that.
Astrid is also as big as a house and twice the size of Layla though they're at roughly the same stage. Astrid is a big woman and she's obviously expecting another elephant like Hamish. They're apparently going to name it after me. She and Patrick are still the mainstays of the pub, though it's a mystery to me how Astrid can dance at this point.
I'll mention to Becky that you'd like to hear from her. I'm sure she'll have a lot to say about all the things that are happening in her life right now. It sounds as if she's going to have a busy winter.
The closing of the base went very well, by the way. We all got extremely drunk and Sauique's comment was that we were going to need the whole winter just to replenish our stocks of alcohol ! Ever cheerful, as usual.
I really miss you,
Karim
PS: Keep an eye out for Michael Osgood, Salvatore Verdeschi and my little sister Aisha at the Moonbase. They left today and they'll be staying on Alpha for a while.
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Brenda,
Whats the extra bit in between your name and your code?
The « DCA2 » bit in my address stands for « Dover Chief Administrator 2 », meaning my second mailbox, the one I now use for private messages. My messages get filtered differently depending on what address they go to. Becky and Layla (and anyone else with authorisation) can read the messages sent to DCA1, but DCA2 is for my eyes only. Obviously, I also have my old address without any DCA in it, and the anonymous one. A lot of message boxes is probably a status symbol. Maybe Koenig has five or six.
Your quotes come out funnily in your messages. What are you using?
I assume you're referring to the French « chevrons » I use instead of ordinary quotes. That's just a whim of mine, because I think they look nice.
I love your messages. Its like reading a novel and makes me realize how little I know about writing properly. Nobody I normally write to writes this well!
Thank you. I'm not quite ready to write a novel yet ! As to no one else writing this well, that presumably depends on who you write to. Most people use visual or audio communications, so they rarely need to write anything. I have to type up reports all the time, which has probably made me more intimate with the English language than most. I've read a lot about proper spelling and so on and there's also the fact that this isn't my first language. I used to get extra schooling from Michelle Osgood as a child, because my parents were concerned I wouldn't be able to speak and write as well as other children whose parents spoke English already. With all due modesty, I think I ended up doing better than those children, because they felt they didn't need to make any effort. You may not know this, but English language classes are part of our curriculum for the third generation here at Dover, and that includes learning about things like grammar and punctuation. A language is like any tool. You use it better if you know how it works.
Talking about which, I notice you never use apostrophes ('). Any particular reason ? (By the way, you have me all embarrassed now. I'll be carefully checking my messages to make sure they keep the same high quality !)
We went to the grotto and Fatuma Ofori was doing some kind of show there. It wasnt very interesting and I thought about the plays you have at the pub. I miss those Sunday nights.
Maybe you could come back here in a few months' time. I'm sure Becky will invite you to her wedding (which is definitely going ahead). I really wish you could be here. I miss having someone to talk to who isn't a relative or a subordinate. I've gone from being one of the lads to being Mr Chief Administrator. Even Friedhelm calls me « sir ». (He's another one on the overactive reproduction list, by the way. The bulletin board annals for this year will be packed full of little Doverians !)
It sounds as if Nora and her friends are keeping you busy. It's funny to hear you talking about all these trendy people on Alpha. I used to go to school with some of their older siblings and it's funny to hear all those names of people who were just small children the last time I saw them. It makes me realise that I didn't do much socialising the last times I went up to Alpha. I'll get you to give me a guided tour the next time I go there. That'll be in May for the football tournament.
I'll leave this since I have to go and cheer on Sophie and Antonio in their football game. I know Sophie will probably get a bruise and then sulk for the rest of the match. She isn't a great team player or particularly active for that matter. Antonio, on the other hand, is a very dedicated player. He'll be a fantastic striker some day. Maya Souad doesn't play because her hearing aid is too bulky (not to mention that it took months to make, so repairing it would take ages if it broke) but she loves watching the game and is starting to keep track of the corners, free kicks and penalties. The little ones just enjoy the noise. I don't think it makes much sense to them yet.
Love,
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
My dearest Brenda,
I don't really know if we'll be able to meet up when I come to Alpha for the football match. As you said in your message, it depends whether Helena decides to come or not. It'll be something of a state visit anyway. Becky and one of Koenig's assistants (whose name has dropped out of my head) are organising all sorts of things that I could be doing while I'm up there. I really can't see Helena missing an opportunity like that.
I really want to see you again. Reading these messages from you just makes me think about you all the time. I wish I could hop on an Eagle and just come and see you, to hell with Helena and all these people. But you know it's always the same old story. But you know I still love you.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Brenda,
Layla has had her baby. It took thirteen hours to get there, but she finally gave birth to a little girl. They're going to call her Karima Marie, so she's the first of no doubt a long line of Doverians with a « Karim » somewhere in their name. First there were Johns, then there were Tonys and now there are Karims. Between you and me and the gate-post as Helena would say, I think Karima Marie is an absolutely awful name.
I can't wait until May. Even with Helena there you'll be here and I'll be able to see you. Even if it's just at the football match.
Darling, I'll do everything I can to meet you. I can see pictures of you on your computer file. What I really want to do is see you in person, hold you in my arms and give you a big kiss. I could do with a big kiss. Maybe I should write a law that says the Chief Administrator is entitled to a kiss every now and then. Helena doesn't exactly give that sort of thing away and it was all different with you anyway. You only had to smile and I was on fire.
Helena has turned into a one woman populationist lobby. She wants another child but I would feel like a hypocrite. I don't want to sleep with her when I know what it was like to sleep with you. Helena has all the sex appeal of a sack of potatoes and I can't pretend she inspires me any more than that. Making another child would be a lie to show the world how happy we are when anyone who matters in the world - our families and friends - already know better. Helena has been listening to Davey's crap about the spirit of Loki entering all the humans conceived on the planet and she seems to think that a sixth child would qualify her for sainthood or something.
My dear, I don't want to tire you with this constant baby talk. I want to have you here with me. Preferably sitting on my knee in the office here so that I can lean on your curves when I'm writing my messages and breathe in the smell of your body. Add a bit of nakedness to the thought and you'll have a fantasy that would make Helena's head drop off ! But fantasies are all I have these days.
I love you,
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
My love,
Your last message nearly made me blush ! But what a wonderful way to start the day knowing that someone so far away is having such delicious thoughts about me. I don't know how comfortable you would find this desk but as I sit behind it now I wonder how I will face people who come to see me knowing what you've been thinking.
Becky has just reminded me that we need to discuss the continuing works at Koenigshafen with Mr Martinez and a few others this morning so I will leave you. Before I do, I have to share something with you.
Becky came in this morning and sat down in the office. Very seriously, she told me that she had decided not to marry Jorge because the child wasn't his and she wanted to marry me instead. She said she had enlisted Helena's help to secretly get a sperm sample from me to make the baby because she was actually a secret devotee of Davey's and thought that as the Chief Administrator I would have more « Spirit » than Jorge. I was baffled by all this nonsense until I realised today is the first of April ! So there I was a complete April Fool.
Must dash,
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
My dearest Brenda,
saw about Uwe Karim on the bulletin boards. Say hello to her from me
I got Becky to said hello to Astrid on your behalf. I thought it would be suspicious if I was the messenger. Astrid apparently said that you had already sent her a message, which is what I was about to tell you to do. As expected, Uwe is another bouncing baby. Patrick is already talking about having another one but Astrid gave him a dirty look. Ralph organised a big party in the pub as he always does when he has another grandchild.
I went to see my parents yesterday and my mother said she was so happy we were all having so many children because it shows that humanity will thrive even when all the people born on Earth are gone. I've been a long time answering you because we're all very sad in the family. I don't know if you remember how my father kept forgetting words in mid-sentence. You probably didn't see enough of him to notice. This was reaching the stage where he could barely speak English and Halima sent him to Alpha with Basma to have a lot of tests done. The diagnosis is that he has Alzheimer's disease which makes his brain cells die at a very high rate. He came home yesterday and he has changed so much. He kept calling me Ibrahim which was the name of his brother and then when Layla showed him Karima, he called the baby « Souad ». That was one of the children my mother and he had before Breakaway. My mother is devastated and I don't know what we're going to do.
I'm sorry this message couldn't be more cheerful but I am really worried. My father can still take care of himself for now but Halima said that wouldn't last and that he would need permanent care. Mamma will look after him when she has her cataracts removed but in the meantime Basma will have to care for him. She and her husband have been looking after our parents for some time now and she's getting angry about this because she feels we're all dumping all our responsibilities on her. But with Aisha off on Alpha, Layla with a new baby and me as Chief Administrator, Basma and Pedro are the only ones who can afford to do this especially as Pedro is a doctor so he has no excuse.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Brenda,
Thank you for your kind message. I didn't realise your father was ill as well. I suppose it's a sad reality that all the first generation are dying out now. They have for the most part reached their seventies and lived a long and fruitful life, giving birth to this community and many descendants. But it is hard to see things impartially when the people who are dying are your parents.
Fortunately, my father seems to be doing better now. Being back home here at Dover seems to have jolted his memory. He calls me Karim and Layla said that he remembered Ngaio and Karima's names when she went to see him the other day. When I last went to see him, he recited the Al-Rahmân surat (« The Merciful ») from the Koran for the children. Mind you, that is the one that repeats « Which of your Lord's blessings would you deny ? » thirty-one times. Layla says it's also one of the psalms from the Bible, but I wouldn't know about that. At least my father can remember something. It's a pity my children don't understand Arabic.
everyone talking about the football match. They listed the team members for the Alphan side
We're all getting reared up for the football match here too. Only three weeks to go, after all, and one of those weeks will have to be dedicated purely to getting there because the journey currently takes three or four days. Our team will include Friedhelm (of course !), John, Jorge, Neil, Connie, Kiri and myself. That should give your Alphan lot something to think about ! I wonder if the day will ever come when we'll have playing fields big enough for a proper game of football with eleven players in each team instead of wasting our time on piddling little seven-a-side games. One of Duncan's pet projects is an indoor football pitch, but it would probably mean building some kind of giant greenhouse on the Flats rather like the biosphere at Alpha only larger and presumably stronger. Things around here get a far more severe battering from the weather during the bad seasons. But it's a pipe dream to pursue if it ever becomes possible.
In the meantime, Duncan and Mary are having a great time expanding the « Governor's Mansion ». You remember that Mrs Verdeschi invited us to move into the Verdeschi's old quarters provided she could keep the upstairs. We've been living in a building site ever since because Duncan got this bright idea about knocking through to the Osgood apartment which is on the outer edge of the cliff. Since Mary was the only one living there at this point it seemed like the best solution. This way we get an apartment big enough for the children but it just takes a long time to get the layout of the flat right. It looks as though one or two of the children might actually get a room of their own ! That was my dream as a child. I had to share a room with Layla which was hell when we were both teenagers.
Just another three weeks to go...
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Hello Brenda,
Probably my last message before we go up to Alpha. We've all been very busy training for this match and matters haven't been helped by the fact Jorge broke his arm in training last week. This means that Derek will be our mid-field for the match on Alpha. Jorge is really down in the dumps.
Have they decided on a date yet? You told me Rebecca was getting married ages ago but I haven't heard anything. What's with the child too? I'm almost afraid to ask since everyone is so quiet about it.
Don't worry, the silence isn't due to any mishap with the child. To be quite honest I'm not sure Becky and Jorge are getting married after all. They still haven't set a date even though Becky is really showing now (she looks very cute). I asked her about it the other day and she just looked down at herself and said she wasn't going to make « Bride of the Year » and then said she was going to be sick. So that's all I know. It's obviously not something she wanted to discuss. Maybe they'll patch things up now that poor Jorge isn't going to the football match. Or maybe that will simply make things worse.
Mike Osgood says hi. I saw him at the swimming pool the other day and I went to say hello and when he remembered who I was we had a little chat. I didn't see Salvatore. Mike said something about some woman he's seeing. That surprised me as I didn't think he was old enough. He really is fifteen isn't he. not like me thinking Sue Ellen was when she wasn't?
Salvatore is just over sixteen, I think. I think his birthday is in March. I'm glad to hear you saw Mike and you were able to talk a little. Mary says Mike sometimes sounds a bit depressed in his messages because he's a bit lonely on Alpha. I don't really know why Mike and Salvatore had to go up there except that it's presumably a good experience for them. Aisha was dying to go there for ages to stay with her penpal Sharhi so it's not the same. Her letters are full of the fun things they get up to with all their friends (presumably former classmates of yours since they're all around Aisha's age and she's the same age as you).
I've been trying to think of some way to keep Helena out of the way so that I can meet you when I go to Alpha but I haven't come up with any plan yet. It isn't as if she has any friends or relatives to see up there. But I'm sure we can work something out.
I'll hopefully be seeing you next week...
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Hello Rebecca and « yo » to you too !
Yes ! You guessed right in your message : I'm completely miserable ! We all are. They completely slaughtered us. 7-3 ! I really thought we'd do better than that.
Still we cheered ourselves up with a mini-punchup in one of the pubs over here. Take a wild guess as to who was doing the punching. Good old Friedhelm was well beyond his usual two pints and when some fellow from the Alphan team came over to gloat, the guy got what was coming to him. I did manage to stop them but not before the Alphan guy clobbered me. So now my ugly mug is also sporting a black eye. You can't begin to imagine how embarrassed I was when I went to see the Koenigs this evening. The commander seemed very amused more than anything else and then gave me some long story about how his children always beat each other up which I found rather disturbing. My father would have killed us if we'd behaved anything like that. He was the only one allowed to do any beating up. Anyway, the last thing I wanted was to remind the Commander of his children when they were young. I was rather hoping to project the image of a responsible adult, not some kid fresh from a schoolyard scuffle. Inch'allah Koenig won't judge my abilities on this basis or our arses have had it, Becca dear. The last thing we need is him sending some bushy-browed old dodderer to replace me.
Is your lovely spouse enjoying her role as First Lady? I can just imagine her swanking around Alpha.
Swanking is a good description. She trots around Alpha as if she's been newly promoted to royalty. I half expected her to be invited to a school inspection and spend her day kissing babies. While I go around being made to feel alternatively like a curiosity or a teenybopper (depending on who I talk to), Helena simpers effortlessly at everyone we meet, turning on and displaying a great deal more charm than I would ever have thought she possessed. I think I will get the printing service here to built a life-size cardboard cut out of me to carry around with her, so that I can return to my duties while she entertains the high and mighty. I shudder to think what she will do when we come home. All the comments she makes whenever she deigns to talk to me revolve around what a backwater Dover is compared to Alpha. She looks around and sees luxury and sophistication. All I see is white plastic yellowed with use. Still, if she is no enamoured of the place, perhaps there's some way we could accidentally « forget » her here when we hop on the Eagle to get home.
Have you seen Brenda yet? And if so, did you get your leg over?
I thought that wasn't an expression old Americans used. You got that one from Kate, didn't you ? And where I put my legs whether over or between anyone else's is nothing to do with you. Have I ever asked you if you and Jorge have to change position to accommodate little miss Lump ? (A burning question in my mind, of course, since there has never been any question of accommodating lumps for the purposes of intimacy in my family ! I don't suppose you could satisfy my curiosity when I get back ?)
I have seen Brenda, but in public and with no ambiguity as to the relative position of our legs. As part of our entertainment schedule up here, Helena and I were lured into the depths of the Grotto. I remember going there when I was a kid (younger than the kid Koenig thinks I am now) but it has all changed again. Some fellow called Akira Fujita was playing absolutely the worst music I've ever heard, worse even than Davey at his most pretentious. I assume this Akira is something to do with your friend Kyoko (remember her? The one who had an up and downer with Akiko about what Japanese women were supposed to be like). Anyway, he's also Brenda's ex-brother-in-law, the husband of Brenda's ex-sister-in-law Lucie. Bear with me: there's a point to all this. The point being that Brenda was also there with about a million other people. We were able to get together in one of the alcoves and have a quick snog, which was nice but nowhere near enough.
Then her roommate's brother, a guy called Dominic, popped up out of nowhere and she introduced us. She'd described him to me as « cute » in one of her messages and I suppose that's about all you could say about the man. Light brown hair, blue eyes, no obvious deformities. He evidently lucked out in the genetic lottery because his sister Nora is an absolute dog. So Brenda told him who I was and he gave me a sort of supercilious look that said something like « Oh so you're the married guy Brenda was shagging at Dover ». He convinced her to dance with him and they left me alone. She mouthed something about calling me as they waltzed away but I'm not too hopeful. I know you gave me that great long speech about how seven months would make a big difference (true, your girth is proof of that) and how seeing Brenda on her home turf would be different from seeing her down here. So you were right, O Romance Expert Person. The thought that I might not see her again doesn't even hurt all that much. Just a bit.
How is Jorge doing ? And have you decided on names for the first instalment of your progeny ?
My regards to the Lump. Oh, and the baby too.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
I'm glad to know your hyperactive not-yet-infant kept you awake long enough to receive and reply to my message instantly. My reply is a bit slower because Swank and I have been busy with our official duties. We visited various factories yesterday, which was very interesting. I think a foundry would be a great addition to our little textiles conglomerate at Koenigshafen. It would be more useful than that piddling little plastics factory Duncan had in mind because we would be able to use the natural resources from Loki without waiting for Alpha to process them, unlike the petroleum (since the last thing I want at Koenigshafen is a refinery). I think the only reason we don't already make our own steel is because a foundry needs to be in a big factory. But if the engineers were able to fix the problem of keeping the Koenigshafen Eagle hangar in one piece, surely we could have similarly large facilities for a foundry. I know, I'm thinking out loud and no doubt mainly motivated by the idea of manufacturing our own ice-skates (am I reading your mind yet ?), but I'll run the idea past Duncan when I get time.
Positions, shmositions! I can't keep any food down, Jorge has a broken arm, and you expect us to be trying out creative positions? Jeez, you really do need to get some, don't you! It's affecting your brain!
You'd be amazed, but I've actually been offered « some ». In the midst of all my witticisms about meeting Brenda last night (or was it the night before ?) I forgot to mention this girl who came up to me in the Grotto. It was difficult to make out everything she was saying above the racket from your friend's brother (sorry about the last message, by the way. I wasn't aware that you were still in close contact with Kyoko. From the sound of things, you forgot all about your best buddy Brenda the minute she left and I assumed that was what you usually did.) Anyway, what I did get was that the girl was offering some free-of-charge company. Maybe I really do have the Spirit of Loki in me. I can't think of any other reason why these women would want to sleep with me, unless Brenda has been spreading rumours about my prowess (which is, of course, exceptional !). I'll have to try it on with a few women at Dover and see if they're as impressionable as the Alphans. Of course, I'll need a willing guinea-pig first. Perhaps someone in my close staff might volunteer...
What do you mean "first instalment"? I'm not going through all this again. I've never been so ill in all my life.
Isn't there anything Halima can do for the nausea ? You've been in a dreadful state for months and I don't remember Helena being so sick with any of her pregnancies. Of course, Helena, as we all know, is made of cast iron. She popped them out every year as if it was as easy as shelling kapok pods. (And yes, I can afford to be glib about it since my participation in the matter was minimal and she made sure to keep it that way. I was barely allowed to mop her brow.)
I'll tell you another thing: I can't see myself getting married in this state. Mom keeps going on about how we have to get married before the baby is born, but the last thing I want for the so-called "happiest day of my life" is to be looking like a balloon and puking every time I so much as smell food. All for the benefit of Mr Personality. My life just isn't turning out at all like I had planned!
Becky, if that's how you feel, don't get married ! You've already decided to go ahead and have the baby, but there's no law that says you have to marry the father, whether before or after the birth. I know Jorge wants to marry you, but if it doesn't feel right, then for God's sake don't do it ! This is how Blake and Layla started out, remember ? And if there's one thing that we can be thankful for in our siblings' miserable marriage it's that it's a perfect example of what to do to ruin a life.
Why don't you give yourself some more time to think about it ? Have the baby first and then see if you want to marry Jorge afterwards. Wait until the Lump is removable and Jorge's arm is healed, and then you'll both be able to enjoy a wedding night without any fancy positions. Doesn't that sound reasonable ?
Any sign of Big Brother Blake? Verdeschi junior? Mike the Swimmer? Aisha-not-Castellano? Any of our other lost souls up there?
Very few lost souls in evidence. Your brother Blake is over on Ceres II, so I naturally wasn't about to bump into him. Robert Sauique virtually jumped into my arms when Swank and I were at the plastics factory. To be quite honest, I'd forgotten he was there.
Aisha of course has been our main guide around here (another reason why getting my leg over just isn't an opinion). She has so many friends here that I'd need a database to keep track of them all. I suppose most of them are simply Nthati's friends whom Aisha has inherited as a matter of course but she seems on intimate terms with all of them as if she had lived on Alpha all her life. But then you know Aisha is the type to make friends with a rock. She's so cheery and chirpy that everyone loves her. She seems to be going out with some fellow called Drew (I thought that was a girl's name). I don't much like the look of him but it isn't as if Aisha would listen to anything I say.
Anyway, I did manage to track down Junior and the Swimmer. They live in a tip in the old section of Alpha, obviously a place that was refurbished around Y10 and hasn't seen a decorator or technicians since. Which reminds me, some places at Dover are getting to be like that. Some people are such slobs.
Mike was his usual neat-looking, friendly self but Toto looked as if he hadn't been in his bathroom for months. His hair is long and his fingernails filthy and the only good thing I can say about him is that he's grown a bit. I didn't stay long. It was a bit too surreal in some ways. For all his long curly hair (was Tony's hair curly ? I don't think so), Toto looks and sounds exactly like Tony. But then I called him 'Toto' instead of 'Sal' and the conversation sort of degenerated after that. I decided I had made enough of a show of solidarity with self-exiled Doverians and left.
Have a careful think about your situation with Jorge. You're having his child but that doesn't mean you have to have him as well.
See you next week (yikes ! Already !)
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Becky,
I saw the announcement on the bulletin boards and I guess you decided not to take my advice. Considering how you felt in your message from two days ago, I must admit that I'm puzzled. I don't think you should marry Jorge if you're not one-hundred percent sure he's the man you want to spend the rest of your life with. It doesn't matter that you're having his child and taking the responsibility of raising it. You'll love the child as long as you live. But can you really be sure that the same goes for Jorge ? The two aren't dissociable, you know.
It's none of my business so you don't need to answer me, but ask yourself these questions: do you love Jorge ? Do you see yourself still living with him when you're both in your seventies ? Does he make you feel special when he looks at you ? Do you miss him when he's gone ? Are you content to be alone with him with no other source of entertainment ? If so, then of course you have my blessing. If not, then you know who to sympathise with if things go wrong.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Becky,
I won't be coming back with the football team tomorrow as I'm travelling to Ceres II to continue my grand tour of the solar system. Helena doesn't want to go to Ceres at all, so I'm just taking Friedhelm and a couple of the other dogsbodies with me.
I hope things are going well at Dover and that you're managing all right on your own. Don't forget to send me any official stuff to the DCA1 address as it gets higher priority than this one.
I promise we'll be back for the wedding.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Becky,
It was so romantic. He had a ring ready and he even went down on one knee and make a speech about how happy he would be if I accepted. Karim, he's a sweet man, and if I sounded down on him in my last message, it was just because of these damn hormones. I was all but bawling my head off when he proposed. It was just so perfect I couldn't stand it.
I'm pleased to hear things are going so well. It sounds like the kind of proposal designed to sweep any young woman off her feet. Your mother must be pleased. I'm sure Jorge was sincere when he said you accepting would make him happy. You're a very special young woman, Becky, and I hope he'll treat you well.
Well, that's enough syrup for one message, let's move on to other topics:
Colette if it's a girl or Colin if it's a boy. Actually, I thought of Colette if it was a girl and then decided we could use Colin if it's a boy. I hope it's a girl.
Girls are good. Boys tend to be more noisy and you don't strike me as someone who likes noise. The names are nice, though it's just as well you've decided to marry Jorge. I assume the child will bear his name which is fortunate as someone called « Colin Collins » would probably have a hard life.
I can't believe I'm actually expecting a baby! It's all so much more real now. I can sometimes make out the shape of a foot when it kicks.
Damn. Here I am stuck on an Eagle in the middle of nowhere and I'm missing an interesting show back at Dover. I remember watching Sophie disco dancing in Helena's belly back in 21. I think that was the only time Helena let me see anything interesting. I get the feeling that I've missed out on a lot because of that stupid bitch and her fear of intimacy (or whatever it is). Maybe I should knock someone else up just to get the full experience for the first time in my life !
Did you get any further with Brenda or the girl from the Grotto?
That my dear, is none of your business. I'll only say that I've hopefully worked some innuendo out of my system.
sure Layla will tell you, but your mother had her first cataract operation and seems to be doing alright.
I did get a message from Layla and it was a lot more optimistic than « seems to be doing alright » ! Those cataracts were a plague. Now all she has to worry about is my father, right ?
Okay I'll bite. Why do you put spaces in front of all your punctuation marks?
Because my slate is configured to French typographical standards and I happen to think it makes the text more legible.
I saw your two reports on the DCA1 address. I'll read those now and send you some official responses.
Good luck, future Mrs Personality...
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Hello Becky
So what's Ceres II like?
Very much as I thought it would be. There isn't much to see here, though they have some pretty spectacular views from all the portholes. The community is half the population of Dover during the winter and everyone is very free and easy. I'm helped by the fact Kiri is with us. She knows everyone here. I gather she's notorious for drinking herself into a stupor and sleeping around (what else is new ?), but she's been warmly welcomed by the old timers. I've been learning some things about her that I didn't know before. For instance, her pipe dream is fireworks. That's why she moved to Dover since that's the only place where a fireworks display would be possible. She said she didn't mention anything before because she didn't make much progress. She hopes she can start testing some designs after the winter.
I've spent most of my time talking business with Mr Johnson, the head of operations over here. He's an amiable old fellow with the largest chin I've ever seen on a human being (or any other creature for that matter). We're sort of talking about possibly exchanging raw materials directly between the two sites rather than going through Alpha but I don't know how the Alphans would see that. They might prefer to keep a hold on resource distribution. Still we might draw up a proposal with measures to possibly implement in the next good season. This would be very, very useful if we had a foundry at Dover.
He showed me the building site for the infamous swimming pool. From the look of things it'll be small and as efficient as it can be as far as water recycling goes, though Johnson admitted they'll need an extra Eagle's worth of water any time the water needs to be replenished. The design looks very interesting and since we don't have to worry about water most of the time I asked him to send the design specs to Duncan. If he thinks it's feasible, we're getting an indoor swimming pool. This has also convinced me to get in some more feasibility studies about a football ground and ice-rink. I know those are less justifiable than a swimming pool which can be used for physiotherapy and pregnant women but the sooner we look into it, the sooner we can see if they're possible. Johnson was very enthusiastic about a football field since he's a big football fan (he commiserated with me about our loss last week and said that the Ceresians supported Dover). He pointed out that a seven-a-side field would actually be smaller than the hangar at Koenigshafen when it's finished. Grow lamps could even keep some lawn going which would be a luxury after playing among the bushes on the Flats. This wasn't his idea but I think we could possibly complement the football ground with an indoor garden like the biosphere on Alpha (their turf is terrible there, by the way, because it's used as a strolling ground most of the time. They just take the benches off for the matches so the lawn is wrecked.) I can't wait to get home and get Duncan on the case. That'll be just up his corridor, as it were.
Yes, Mom is overjoyed by it all because she feels she doesn't have enough grandchildren. I don't know if she thinks she in competition with other grandmothers, but she did complain that Alibe has three times more grandchildren than she does.
I know the feeling. The only person I know (aside from Davey and Helena) who thinks Swank and I should reproduce more is my mother. She only had three siblings but her mother was one of eleven children ! Mamma obviously thinks her grandmother had the right idea. Just lay a million kids and something will turn up to feed and take care of them. Still, Mamma can't complain. She's doing quite nicely as far as grandchildren go.
John and Akiko are trying their best but Akiko doesn't exactly pop them out like your Swank. Blake, of course, is unlikely to reproduce again any time soon.
Oh, I don't know. I heard he has a girlfriend over here, someone called Dawn. I haven't seen him yet because he's been promoted to dogsbody and has been out on some asteroid for the last week but I've been invited to a card game tomorrow with Blake and a fellow called Kevin Doherty. We'll see how that goes.
By the way, Kevin Doherty's children are called Avon and Cally. He mentioned they're named after characters in an old television series. Do you have any idea which one that might be ?
Matthew seems to be in no hurry to jump on ye old Alphan bandwagon. They're all boys so as far as Mom is concerned, they don't count anyway. She's really looking forward to both me and Sue Ellen getting married the same year. And you'll never guess what else little sister is doing just like big sister...
Oh no ! Don't tell me Davey Kano is already starting to reproduce ! I thought we'd be spared until after September. How far along is she ? Don't tell me they conceived something while they were lost in the snow. How is your father reacting to that ? Inch'allah he didn't have a heart attack when he found out !
So who cured you of your innuendo is what I want to know! I answered your question about positions, so maybe you could be a bit more forthcoming...
I don't really think you need to know who your boss is sleeping with but you have a point about the tit for tat (if I may say so !). Let's just say that I haven't added a new mistress to my conscience.
More legible? Sounds more like you're showing off again.
Say what you like, but I like my chevrons and my spaces !
Karim
Complete with chevrons and spaces
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Salam alikoum, Rebecca !
I'm on my way home. The Eagle will take us straight to Dover... « Straight » meaning a week-long trek through the solar system to try and catch up with Loki as it runs away from us towards its apogee out there in the middle of nowhere. We're really rattling around in this thing since naturally no one from Ceres wants to go to lovely frozen Dover at this time of year. All this travelling makes me realise that Eagle 8 is not the most comfortable place to live in. Maybe we could get another one specially for long hauls. Less of a cattle truck and more of a comfortable means of travel. It's all very well to have an Eagle that can carry fifteen people but if it's supposed to be the only escape pod for over a hundred people we might as well drop the escape pod aspect and make it more comfortable.
Jeez! Thirty lines about your dreary football ground. You must surely have more interesting things to talk about!
Well let's see if I can find a more suitable topic of conversation for you. Babies ? There were few of those at Ceres II since they have much smaller quarters and you can't just knock down walls and excavate new rooms like at Dover. So I got the impression their families might be smaller. Marriages ? I do have one to report. Brenda said her ex-husband Emile has lost no time in proposing to his new girlfriend Pierrette so that's the only upcoming Alphan marriage I know of. No obvious sign of that sort of thing on Ceres II. Relationships ? Nothing to report unless you count yours truly getting friendly with the natives.
You must tell me more about Blake
I realise that I should have written to you after we had our card game. I remembered you complaining that he never writes so I had a go at him about that. He promises to write more often in future but said that he was nervous of your father (what a surprise).
He came back to Ceres the day after I sent you my last message. He's looking very good though very pale and he seems to have built up some muscles as well. He said he wasn't really going out with the girl I'd heard about. That was a relief to hear because it turns out the girl in question is about fifteen (though you wouldn't think it to hear the little hussy speak !). It was good to see him again. I always got on better with Blake than with John, no offence to your big brother, but Blake was someone I really thought of as a friend. It's a pity he's exiled on Ceres II but perhaps he could come back now that Layla is remarried and there's been plenty of water under the bridges. He says he's built a good life for himself on Ceres II so he wouldn't want to live at Dover again (traitor !) but of course he'd love to come down and see all you lot and his kids. I'll have a word with Layla about that when I come back and if you like I'll talk to your father too. Blake definitely wants to come to your wedding and Sue Ellen's. Could you hold them close together for his convenience ? No I suppose not, not if you and Jorge have to get married before the baby is due in August.
Let's face it, Sue Ellen is really bandwagon material. She spent most of last year mooning around and thinking about weddings and babies (and at that time, Toto). So of course, the instant it's legal she decides to have both. Especially with Davey telling her that this is just what the Will-O'-The-Wisp wants.
Yeah, it's funny how Davey marrying the youngest and prettiest girl available just happens to be exactly what the local deity wants. It's on the lines of God telling Mohammed that it's okay for him to have nine wives and marry his first cousins, but everyone else has to limit themselves to four wives who are no relation and must be treated with scrupulous equality (to which Layla would no doubt respond that Mohammed was entitled to special rules since he was a special person, otherwise God wouldn't have been talking to him in the first place). I'll be interested to see what else this Spirit tells Davey. I'm in no doubt that whatever it tells him, I will hear all about it from Helena. I guess some people just need to be told what to think all the time.
Talking about which, I forgot to mention above that Blake seems to have got religion and Layla's religion at that. That actually struck me as very amusing, because it means Layla might now have more in common with her ex-husband than with her current husband (Neil isn't very religious, is he ?).
Of course I need to know who my boss is sleeping with. How can I cover for you if I don't know what's going on?!?
I promise to tell you all about it when I get back to Dover.
See you on Friday,
Karim
PS: I am not a « pretentious git » !
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Ma petite Aisha,
What was the wedding like?
I was surprised to get a message from you about this, since I thought you would hear from Layla or Basma. But I suppose the former is busy with her baby and the latter is busy with Father.
To be quite honest, Becky and Jorge's wedding was not the most cheerful event I ever witnessed. Becky was very sick and Jorge still has his arm in a sling. It was a private computer wedding, though Layla also did a brief blessing at Jorge's request. Mrs Collins and Sue Ellen seemed thrilled, which was just as well because I don't think anyone else was. Even Davey, who seems to be turning into quite a family values person as his marriage to his twee girlfriend approaches, was expressing some private doubts about Becky's enthusiasm for the whole affair. On the other hand, I can testify to the fact that Becky's pregnancy has sent her hormones rocketing all over the place. One minute she is weeping her eyes out because old Sauique has had a go at me, and the next she's deliriously happy because the recycling efficiency in the sewage circuit has been improved by 5-percent. I'm assuming the wedding just caught her on an off day.
And what are you up to these days ? Still enjoying that lovely job manufacturing underwear ? And what, if anything, have you done about that dodgy boyfriend of yours ?
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Salut ma petite,
I've actually been promoted to making uniforms now.
I'm glad to hear that making trousers is a promotion. It's a pity your friend's child had to break his leg for you to get her job for a while. I still think you should see if there's an opening in the Computer Section or even in Main Mission. I know you've spent most of the last three years working in the cloth processing plant down here, but you write well and you have some experience as an operative, so why don't you check the job boards and give it a try ?
Drew was getting heavy on me, talking marriage and all that.
I'm glad you agree that Drew was a suspiciously dodgy person. I know you probably feel that I don't like any of your boyfriends and that's probably true. If I had my way, I'd vet the pedigree of every man who comes anywhere near you. Now that you're off on your own on Alpha, I'm beginning to see why our ancestors were so adamant to keep their women out of reach of prying eyes ! But that's just the talk of an over-concerned big brother. All I can do is worry about you, and reassure myself with the thought that you're big enough to take care of yourself (at nearly 22 I should hope so !).
I hate to say this, but would you say you have a habit of attracting nutcases, or turning ordinary guys into weirdoes at least. Didn't Ahmed Ofori turn a bit peculiar back in the days when you were going out with him ? I'm sure (Inch'allah) that you'll find someone to settle down with eventually. In the meantime, enjoy your shopping ! Just keep away from the weirdoes.
My co-worker is Brenda Blackmore-Lameroux. I'm sure you remember her
I do indeed. I haven't heard any news from her in a while. What's she up to these days ?
Big kisses,
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Aisha,
I must admit that I thought long and hard about what I should answer to your last message. I didn't realise you and Brenda were such close friends. Nor did I think she would so free with her confidences. All I can say is that it's true and I would have preferred to keep you out of this. For God's sake, don't tell anyone. Although I was in love with Brenda, the affair was a mistake and, unfortunately, has turned into a liability in my present situation. I know people will eventually hear about it from various sources, but it would be better if that happened later rather than sooner. I need time to prove myself as an efficient administrator before I am judged for mistakes I have made in the past.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Hello,
I positively loathe the woman. So you can bonk anyone as far as I'm concerned !
I'm sorry to hear you have such a low opinion of my wife of seven years. She really isn't the ogre you seem to depict in your message, and I don't feel that her being so unpopular with other people justifies me having an affair. Helena is an excellent mother to my children and someone who deserves respect for putting up with me all these years. It isn't her fault if she isn't the love of my life. My only consolation on that subject is that I don't seem to be the love of hers either. I don't regret the affair inasmuch as I have learned a lot about myself and what I need from life, but I do regret putting my wife and children in this situation. For your information, Helena is aware of the affair and we've come to a private compromise on the subject.
I am now going out with Nthati's ex-boyfriend Vladimir, who is a real cutie. He's the dumb blond type, though, so I'm not too hopeful it will last. At least Drew had a couple of brain cells to rub together.
No wonder you're not offended by my behaviour. I take back my statement about you turning your boyfriends into weirdoes. You're one yourself ! Going out with your flatmate's boyfriend (whether ex- or not) ? Ah well, after Karim the Pen-pusher, Layla the Religious Nut, and Basma the Boring, maybe it was time someone in our family showed some originality.
In response to your other question, I have to say that yes, we're quite busy down here. We still have stocks of kapok to spin, weave and make into useful items, not to mention quite a lot of shermeen to process. The Hydroponics people are working full time to keep us supplied in fresh fruit and vegetables. The Catering section still have to process the surplus products so that they'll keep. The life support and power supplies have to be maintained and monitored along with the usual sanitation and cleaning work. We're expanding the inner areas of the Northern Bay (and running a week-long poll on the question of whether it should be renamed « Verdeschi Bay »). All the children have to be educated and entertained, their health monitored and taken care of. The population will probably have increased by 10-percent by the end of the season, which means more work for parents and caring services. They're also busy making preparations for Children's Day. In fact, I have to say that we have so much to keep us busy that we're actually short-staffed in some areas. So much for the idea that there was never anything to do at Dover during the winter.
Personally, I'm also improving myself by reading some seminal works of political thinking (or is it just propaganda ?). I've been reading that copy of the Communist Party Manifesto Father has. I seem to remember you saying you had read it some time ago. Interesting from a historical point of view, but not exactly relevant to our present situation. I think Marx would have been pleased to see that a non-capitalist society can thrive.
I wrote to Becky and didn't get a reply.
That's probably because Becky is in the Medical Centre. I'm sure you'll want all the details so here they are, though all I need to know is that she's ill. She has a condition called pre-eclampsia which means there's something wrong with her child's placenta and it's making them both sick. Halima is going to wait another couple of weeks and if things get worse, the baby will be induced or she'll perform a caesarean. Either way, it's not how Becky imagined things at all. She really hasn't been having a good time with this pregnancy. I hope Jorge won't expect her to go through another one any time soon. Halima will also be keeping an eye on Sue Ellen's pregnancy because it's a condition that runs in families and more likely to affect teenage mothers.
I wish you luck with your dumb blond. Maybe you should consider looking for a real boyfriend one of these days, not just various nutcases and idiots.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Aisha,
Sorry about the dig at Helena. I'm sure she has qualities the rest of us don't see.
I'm glad you realise that. This is your sister-in-law you're talking about, after all and yes she does have qualities the rest of us don't see. In fact, I think the children are the only ones who see those qualities. I've been encouraging her to work in the school since the Facilities work these days is nothing that can't be handled (better) by Marion. You know the run up to Children's Day is always full of preparations for the school play and the various activities.
This year's play is Basma, Louisa and Derek's adaptation of a book called The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe. Lots of speculation as to which one of the adapters is the "wardrobe", of course. Sophie actually got one of the main parts which really surprised me. She plays a little girl called Lucy who has to save her naughty brother who gets lost in a parallel universe. That's the gist of what I understand at least. Nicholas plays her brother and then Basma and Pedro play their older siblings (a bit strange, but there weren't any older children to play the parts). Becky was originally supposed to play the witch of the title, but she obviously won't be able to do it. Connie has had to replace her, but from the look of the rehearsals, she'll make a good witch. I'm really looking forward to it because we didn't have a play last year as the children were a bit too young to remember lines so they sang songs instead.
The dumb blond and I are doing just fine, thank you. I was probably a bit unfair in my last message. He isn't quite as thick as he looks.
That sounds like damning with faint praise in my book. You haven't mentioned how Nthati feels about you going out with her former boyfriend. Are you sure this is such a good idea ?
Becky's condition sounds terrible ! I'm so sorry she's having a hard time
We all are. She's getting used to lying up in the Medical Centre. Or rather lying down. Her face and arms have puffed up and she's connected to so many machines she reckons she doesn't even need to breathe because they're doing so many things for her. The baby is apparently healthy, though, and is due to be born in two weeks' time, so Halima is going to see if they can wait until the due date rather than doing anything now. Becky's spirits are better now that she knows it's nearly over. On the other hand, Jorge isn't looking too chipper these days, since I think he's been seriously considering the possibility of losing both the child and the mother. Fortunately, Becky is in excellent hands.
How is Father ?
Very much the same as he was before you left, only a bit worse as usual. Basma and Pedro still look after him and Mamma, though Mamma is able to help a lot now that she has recovered from her cataract operation. They've moved back into their old people's home near the Medical Centre, so Basma gets her own place back for the time being. We've been getting advice from Crystal Davies up on Alpha, since her father has the same disease.
Someone (I won't tell you who) suggested creating a « loony bin » to put Father and Djemila Najim in. Perhaps up on Alpha, with Mr Davis. I suppose there's some good in the idea of putting handicapped people in one place where they can be cared for by one set of people rather than their individual families, but it sounds a lot like sweeping a problem under the carpet. Hand over your sick and elderly over to someone else for safekeeping until they finally do us all a favour and die ? It doesn't appeal to me. On the other hand, I'm not the one looking after Father. The suggestion wasn't Basma's, but she wasn't shocked when I suggested it. Aren't you lucky you're on Alpha and don't have to worry about all this ?
Give my regards to your many friends.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Happy birthday !
I do hope you'll be celebrating tonight. Twenty-two years old: I can nearly remember when you were born. Nearly, but not very precisely, that is. It was more a case of « Here's your sister » and me thinking « Damnit, not another one ! ». It's very difficult to believe you're already twenty-two, though. That makes me nearly... well, old, anyway.
The Children's Day celebration up here were pretty extravagant, with plays, music and a lot of games. But since I'm neither a child nor a mother, it didn't mean much to me.
I can understand that. I have to say that seeing Sophie act was the high point of the day in my view. She had her hair straightened and done up in long plaits which looked very cute. I know she's my daughter and I'm biased, but I think she's going to be absolutely gorgeous when she grows up. Provided, of course, she ducks that damn acne present on both sides of the family. Inch'allah she'll be spared that ordeal. As I speak, I am feeling an eruption on my nose, and Basma is still fighting a daily battle to try and preserve her face. You and Layla were insultingly lucky !
How is Becky doing now ?
She had the baby yesterday and we all heaved a sigh of relief. She now has a remarkably healthy little girl called Colette, like the French author (did you read Mamma's copy of Gigi ?). Actually, I don't think the child's name has anything to do with the author, but it's a nice name and she's a nice little girl (as far as I can tell at this stage). Jorge is absolutely over the moon. After the deep funk he was in the last few weeks, it's great to see him so happy again. Becky still needs to stay in the Medical Centre for a while and it'll be another month or two before she's back on duty. Then I'll presumably have to get used to the baby being present at work until it's weaned. I wasn't so intimately involved with our children, since Helena never worked with me.
Thanks for sending my friends your regards. It's weird, but some of the people here go a bit funny when they hear the name Habibi. It's as if I was a Koenig or something.
Now, that is amusing. I suppose everyone is aware that I'm the head of Dover (and currently the only show in town on Loki, since all the other bases are closed). Do they expect you to do favours or have access to more resources, or is it more a case that they look at you funny and don't associate with you so much ?
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Aisha,
Thank you very much for your birthday greetings. I actually celebrated my birthday with a night out with Helena, which makes a big difference, wouldn't you agree ? We unleashed the children on Basma and Pedro (since they want a big family too, we like to give them a taste of things to come !) and then we had a quiet night at the Pub. Mind you, when I say quiet, I'm being generous, since it was the weekly sing along. Basma was pretty cut up about missing that, but she had already promised to watch the children on my birthday. Davey and Sue Ellen are beginning to be a regular presence at these events. I believe Sue Ellen is pretty much tone-deaf, but you know how musical Davey is when he can get his mind away from that spirit business.
I'm pleased to report that Helena and I are getting on better than we have for years. She took the hint and has begun work in the school, leaving Facilities to Marion. Quite honestly, I don't know what possessed Saskia to give Helena that job in the first place, aside from a gesture to her late mother. Anyway, the new job has made Helena very much happier. She is now a follower of Layla's religion, since Davey has thrown his lot in with our sister. The result is that she's a lot more reasonable and amenable than she had become recently.
That's great news about Becky and Colette. With all your concerns about population, you must be pleased that Jorge and Becky are unlikely to have more children.
I'd be more pleased if the circumstances were less dire. Having a limited progeny on pain of death (or at least serious illness) is not the same as deliberately choosing to have a small family. Anyway, I've given up on my plans to proselytise about population reduction. This is obviously not the time for such old-fashioned concerns. We need the children. Or more specifically, we need their nimble hands and sentient brains for farming and manufacturing (particularly the latter because someone has to make the machines that make the machines which can do all the rest). Now all we have to worry about is Sue Ellen. Halima thinks she may develop the same condition as Becky, though she seems to be alright so far.
Besides, I've always suspected that you had a bit of a crush on Becky.
A « crush » ?!? What am I, some kind of teenybopper ? Becky is my indispensable and highly competent assistant, and the days of bosses sleeping with their assistants is long gone. I'd be grateful if you didn't spread such ludicrous ideas any further.
Talking about boyfriends, I suppose Brenda won't have told you that she's found someone as well. His name is Dominic and I think she used to share quarters with his sister until just recently.
You're right when you said she didn't tell me but then there's no reason why she should. I'm very happy to know that she has found someone new. I certainly wouldn't expect her to be moping after me ! We talked when I came over in May and although she didn't say anything about Dominic, it was obvious to me that there was something going on between them. He certainly seemed very attentive. Come to think of it, I also assumed from his behaviour that he knew about Brenda and me. I guess the secret must be all over Alpha by now.
Talking about secrets, could you be really devious and listen out for some rumours for me ? Davey Kano's sister Hillary and her husband turned up at Koenigshafen on a supply run a few days ago. Officially, they're here for Davey's wedding, but I'm not so sure I believe that. It doesn't make sense for them to leave Alpha (and their two children) to come down here just before Children's Day. The wedding isn't until mid-September and I can't believe anyone from Alpha would come and bury themselves at Koenigshafen of all places in the middle of the winter season. The woman is pregnant and talks as if she's doing some kind of drugs. Her husband is still the same humourless twerp he was when he came down here for his tour of duty and says there's nothing wrong. See if you hear anything, but don't worry if you don't. I might just be letting my feelings about her brother colour my judgement of this pair.
They don't really treat me differently. It's just that I see the look in their eyes as they recognise my last name.
I'm pleased to hear it's no worse than that. I remember sometimes thinking that the Koenigs had all the luck when I was a child. They could waltz off in an Eagle with Carter whenever they liked, do their homework in their father's extraordinary office, and get their cuts and bruises fixed by their own mother. I had to stand in queue with a bunch of other kids to get any of those things. I just wasn't part of the « in » crowd (you wouldn't know about any of this: you're « in » crowd material anyway !). Mind you, that's probably why I was so determined to get to the front of the queue down here. Nothing like motivation to make for excellence (don't laugh !). Anyway now, of course, I realise that my own children will be in the same situation as the Koenigs were, and may be perceived the same way. Same goes for you and the rest of the family, of course.
What happened about the Northern Bay ?
The vote was in favour of renaming it to Verdeschi. I initially wanted to suggest renaming the whole of Dover, since Tony Verdeschi is without doubt the most important person to have lived here, but Becky thought that would be too confusing now that everyone is used to Dover. Though old Petra Droessler actually chipped in on the message conversation and pointed out that people got used to calling her native town, Chemnitz, "Karl-Marx-Stadt" for thirty years and then "Chemnitz" again when Marx went out of fashion. But I still agree with Becky: Dover is a good name for historical reasons. Still, the next important place on Loki that needs a name is going to be called Verdeschi if I have any say on it. Maybe a mountain would do. Morrow got a forest and Bergman a lake, and isn't Kano getting a lake as well ? Verdeschi deserves better than a cliff. After all, the others didn't even live here !
As you can see, being « Cadmin » doesn't just involve boring stuff.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Aisha,
A dinner with Helena ? Is that what you're reduced to ?
It isn't a matter of reduction, it's a matter of principle. I'm married and I should make the most of my wife. I don't ever want to place myself in the same situation as I did with Brenda again. The least I can do is at least try my hand at virtue. I have a feeling I'm going to find it both boring and frustrating. But then no one said that life was a bed of roses (or maybe it is, judging by the painful bits).
Zilch on Hillary Kano. No general knowledge rumours at least. She doesn't inspire that kind of interest. Brenda suggested asking her ex, since he's replacing Kano as head of Catering while she's on « holiday ». His new wife Pierrette went out with Vladi for a while, so I'll do some investigating for you if I can.
Your friend Vladimir certainly gets around, doesn't he ? I'm surprised he hasn't settled down yet, since most people are married by his age. Are things serious ? You don't talk about him much. All you tell me is how stupid he is.
As to Hillary Kano, we haven't found out much on this end either. She and her husband keep to themselves at Koenigshafen. The general impression over here is that they think themselves too superior to come and stay with the plebs in the Visitor's Section. But maybe they just want to keep away from anyone. Koenigshafen is a good place for that. I asked Davey and he seems as puzzled as the rest of us, though Sue Ellen told Becky that Hillary seems to have had a nervous breakdown. Maybe she suffers from the same mental illness as her brother. Halima is supposed to give her a check-up on her pregnancy this week, so maybe I'll find out something more then. It may just be an innocuous need for a holiday. I wouldn't be so curious if she weren't Davey's sister.
I do have some interesting gossip though. Nthati went out with Sal Verdeschi the other night and she said that he
Now, that was a lot more than I needed to know about Salvatore Verdeschi's sex life ! Or your friend Nthati's for that matter. Toto is a bit young to be going out with women your age, isn't he ? I have to say I'm surprised he attracts any interest. He didn't look like the sort of person a grown woman would want to associate with the last time I saw him. I didn't think « scruffy », « scrawny » and « unkempt » figured on the job description of the ideal male. I mentioned your revelation to Becky and she shrugged her shoulders and said it was normal for a young boy to be sewing his wild oats. I don't think she gave the situation much thought since she was feeding the baby, but maybe she's right. I wasn't the type to sleep around at his age, but then I was pretty strange (look who I married, after all !).
I don't think people know about you and Brenda, except that one of Vladi's friends said you probably got a « lot of girls » as CA. I didn't get the feeling he knew anything, though. Brenda was there and I was the only one who looked at her.
Good to hear. Just make sure you don't do too much looking at her when people mention my private life. I must say I feel better knowing that you know so that neither Brenda nor I have to lie to you. Maybe there's truth in the old saying that confession is good for the soul. Layla offers it as a potentially beneficial Catholic spin-off at the Temple, but she's the last person I'd want to confide in !
Mount Verdeschi. That sounds pretty cool. Unless of course you have a weird twisted mind like mine and it sounds like a rude joke. Something Nthati might do, for instance ?
You definitely have a weird, twisted mind ! Are you sure you're the daughter of our pious halal parents ? These message conversations are revealing a side of my sweet, innocent baby sister I would rather not know about...
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Hello little sis,
I'm not particularly surprised that you haven't found out anything about Hillary, despite talking to Emile. We've actually made progress on this side, since Hillary has explained the basics of her situation to Halima. Halima didn't give me any details but said it was very much a private matter. I trust her if she says it isn't something which affects Dover, so we can all let the topic drop.
Oh boy, Emile is gorgeous ! There couldn't be a bigger contrast between you and him !
Well, thank you for this gratuitous blast at my ego, Aishou. Don't worry, I'm well aware of what Emile looks like and take great consolation from the fact that Brenda momentarily preferred me to him. Looks aren't everything, you know.
I'm amazed at how handsome Emile and his brother Jean-Paul are, especially considering their sisters are dogs. Jean-Paul's wife's a dog too, a fat one at that, but Emile's new wife is quite cute. Doesn't really have the same unusual looks as Brenda, though. Just sallow skin and brown eyes and hair like the rest of us (in our natural state, that is).
I take it none of these women you're so critical of are actually friends of yours. It never ceases to amaze me how critical women are of each other's appearance ! I thought I'd look all these people up on the computer files to give you my informed opinion. I don't agree that the Castellano women are « dogs » and Aisha Ofori is not « fat ». In fact, in the picture of her on the Children's Day board, she looks remarkably trim. You should look so good after you've had seven children ! (Helena doesn't and she's « only » had five...)
Why don't you check out the anonymous boards ? People talk about all sorts of things there, mostly sex, and you could probably get some good advice without everyone gossiping.
Oh, all I need. Advice from my friends and relations disguised under silly names like « Zorro » and « Little Miss Muffet ». I think I know what kind of advice I'll get, and I'm already following it: stay with the missus and have a lot of children !
Vladi isn't necessarily very bright, but he's fun to be with.
And so continues your paragraph. If you have such a low opinion of his intelligence, find someone more intelligent, or he'll soon get tired of you talking down to him.
The guy said that the Chem Lab is now making all sorts of great hair products so I let him try some things out. I've now got a perm and my hair is a sort of golden blonde !
That sound you hear is your big brother's mind boggling. I remember what you looked like when you let Becky bleach your hair and it looked awful ! Let's face it, Aisha, you just don't have that kind of colouring. You ended up looking like an Egyptian film star. And why would you need a perm ? Your hair is already curly enough.
You must send me a picture of you so that we can all have a laugh down here !
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Aisha,
So I clobbered him nice and hard right in front of everyone else, and told him to shove off and never see me again. I've never been so pissed off in my life !
Oh, I don't know. I've heard similar language from you on one or two previous occasions. I'd say I was sorry about your break-up with Vladimir, but to be perfectly honest, I didn't get the feeling it was going to last. I actually discussed this with Layla the other day and she said she felt you were treating him too much as if he was stupid, underestimating him if you like. Layla knows all about underestimating people, as we know, and it sounds as if Vladimir got as tired of it as Blake did, but dealt with it better by finding someone else. Actually flirting with the other woman in the Grotto when he thought you weren't there isn't exactly subtle, though.
I doubt that fellow Billy deserved the same physical punishment just because he was laughing at you. You really must learn to control your temper, Aisha. You're not very big and from the look of his picture, your friend Vladi could probably have broken you in half with a chop of his hand. Some day, you're going to get yourself into big trouble.
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Aisha,
So what with everything else, I really didn't need you gloating over this !
I'm sure you didn't, but as your big brother, I consider it my prerogative to gloat and say « I told you so » when something happens which I predicted. In fact, Layla and I both indulged in a gloat. Basma would have joined in, but she was rehearsing a song.
As to him getting back with Nthati, maybe that was in the cards from the start. I don't know. I never liked the sound of that whole situation, and I'm really pleased it's over. It's a pity you've had to move out of Nthati's flat, though. Maybe it's time you came back to Dover to visit your ageing parents, brother and sisters. You haven't even seen Karima yet, have you ?
Anyway, yeah, about Billy. He wasn't too mad at me and asked me out a couple of days later. Turns out his hobby is girls and mine is boys so we're made for each other !
Aisha, you've only just gone through a messy break-up with one boyfriend, do you really need to have another one straight away ? Surely you can survive more than a few days without having some guy attached to you. There's more to life than boyfriends.
Give the boards a try. They're fun and you wouldn't think people were so moral if you read some of the things they say they get up to behind closed doors !
I suspect most of those « things » are fantasies rather than realities.
When is little Sue Ellen tying the knot ? Jiminy Cricket, it's hard to believe a girl nearly four years younger than me is already getting married while I'm still shopping around !
You should try your namesake, your friend Emile's « fat » sister-in-law, who married when she was six years younger than you. Anyway, Sue Ellen and Davey are getting married on the 10th. Yet another rotund bride for our annals (that's what they're called, so no rude jokes !). Come to think of it, shotgun weddings seem to be on the increase these days: Layla's, then Becky's, then Sue Ellen's. Maybe we should dispense with the ceremony altogether. I think I'll have a word with Halima about making sure people use contraceptives. You'd think they weren't available down here or something ! I don't want Dover to get a reputation as the shotgun capital of the Lokian system. At this rate I'll have to raise the age of consent to 25 and make people pass sex education exams before they're allowed to consort with the opposite sex (ah, wouldn't that have pleased our devout Muslim ancestors ?).
Taking about shotgun weddings, Sue Ellen's brother Blake has come down for her wedding. He missed Becky's because he was on a mining expedition that week. To think that all these years, I thought he was working in food processing and the next thing I know, he's off mining asteroids. I suppose they decided to give him a crash course in something useful. It's been great showing him all the things that have changed at Dover. He's already in love with the pub... unless that has something to do with him being reunited (again) with his old mate Kiri. They had a pretty heavy drinking session together last Sunday. Before that, Blake enjoyed our usual show. With Mamma able to take care of Father, Basma has been singing in the pub with Neil again. She has just the most beautiful voice. Blake was completely blown away last Sunday and said they didn't have anything like that on Ceres II (I didn't ask if he meant the pub in general or Basma in particular).
Anyway, I'm sure you get good entertainment in the Grotto as well (when you're not assaulting its denizens, that is).
Karim
From: Habibi, Karim Claudio - DCA2 - AM0801-0002
Dear Aisha,
It's been over a month since I heard from you. I take it from your messages to Layla that you're still going out with this fellow Billy, which sounds promising. Just remember the sequence: romance, marriage and then babies after the rest. Oh, and hopefully romance all along, of course (please imitate Basma, not me and Layla !).
Not a great deal to report on my side. You may have heard that Helena and I are expecting a child in next April. Great discussions about names this time around. Helena suggested giving the child a family name as a given name, the way the Koenigs do (« Preston », « Derrick » and « Blythe » are all old family names). I thought that was a good idea and said that Mamma's surname would make a good name for a boy or a girl: Donatello or Donatella are normal Italian given names anyway. Needless to say, Helena was thinking more on the lines of « Vincent » or « Andrews ». I'm damned if I'm going to give a child a plural name, so we've agreed on « Vincent » for a boy, and « Zaineb » if it's a girl. Davey of all people pointed out to Helena that it was time at least one of our children had an Arab name !
Father is still very much the same as before, driving Mamma and Basma up the walls with his forgetfulness.
I had a look at those bulletin boards, but decided I didn't need advice from "Zorro" on how to run my life. My life is doing fine as it is. Thank you for the suggestion though.
Karim
From: alias "T.E. Lawrence"
Hello everyone,
Interesting discussion. I've been reading up on the past messages and here are some comments from my neck of the woods.
"Clark Kent": Without using the morally-charged term "adultery", I'd say that infidelity is endemic in any society. While there is a natural drive for people to settle down with one person in order to raise children, it's also a fact that there's an incompressible part of the population -- both men and women -- that will continue to have extra-marital or extra-relationship affairs. The scientific explanation is apparently that any mammalian society seeks to expand its genetic diversity; the more parental combinations, the better.
I take it that your argument here is that infidelity is a mechanism nature uses to diversify the genetic stock of a species. I know that the medical profession here are concerned about the weakening of our human genes and the loss of genetic material in couples who for whatever reason are unable to have children together. Under those circumstances, Nina Hagen's argument below makes genetic sense:
"Nina Hagen": It might be in the best interests of the medical profession to encourage polyamory so that women (reproduction always revolves around women, doesn't it) will have children with a diverse genetic background. This would mean more combinations of genes in future generations.
This might make sense with regards to genetics. But then a lot of practices make genetic sense without making sense in the reality of the human condition. The problem with Nina Hagen's argument above is that polyamory just won't work in society as a whole. People are by nature possessive and selfish, and sharing a spouse must require an amount of patience and lack of jealousy which very few people are capable of. This is the same reason why attempts to encourage people to have children with the genetic material of other people will also generally fail. People want to have their own children with their own spouses. They generally don't want to see another woman expecting their husband's child, or see their wife big with another man's child. Some might tolerate that for personal reasons, but I know I wouldn't (despite facts which I will mention later). Infidelity might be a sign of a natural imperative to diversify the genetic material of your offspring, but there's an equally strong drive to make sure that your own genetic material is passed on more than that of other people.
"Confucius": Infidelity is WRONG and that's it!
I honestly do not believe there is any rigid moral fibre governing the universe. Human rules are determined by human nature. We might agree that murder is WRONG, as you put it. But is murdering a Nazi who has massacred a thousand Jews as wrong as murdering your neighbour? We're human beings and although we'd like to think the universe is black and white, the fact is that it isn't. Human behaviour in particular only comes in shades of grey.
Infidelity was condemned under various circumstances (by no means the same in every society) because it goes against the selfish urge to ensure that your partner is only having sex and reproducing with you, and not your neighbour. Infidelity was also tolerated or encouraged in some societies (admittedly mainly to encourage men to sleep with many women and not the reverse) because it caters to the equally selfish urge to pass on your own genetic material to as diverse a set of offspring as possible, to guarantee that your descendants will have the best chance of survival in the long run. In the Big Picture, that of the survival of the human race as a whole, I agree with Clark Kent to say that infidelity might even be beneficial.
But having said all that, I have to agree with Eagle 69:
"Eagle 69": Bottom line is that it hurts people. It hurts your spouse, it hurts your children if you have some, and it can ruin your life. It might "endemic to any society", but if you can avoid it, do. My marriage broke up because my spouse met someone else.
I'm sorry to hear about your marriage, and I have to agree that the bottom line is to examine the effect it has on those around you. They're the only people who can say whether you're wrong or right. In your case, your spouse obviously did a lot of emotional damage. But the question I ask myself is was the affair just an affair, or did your spouse have sincere affection for this other person? In our society, where people often marry very young, it has to be expected that some will discover a few years down the line that the person they married at 18 is not the person they want to be at 25. It may be inevitable that some will meet people they really do want to be with. The dilemma then is whether they should stay with a spouse they don't love rather than pursue the person they do love.
I can speak from the personal experience of this. I have been married a few years now and as dutiful Alphans, my wife and I have several children. I was not in love with my wife when we married. We had known each other pretty much all our lives and, having met all the other marriageable women at my disposal (few, as I was no Casanova), I decided to marry a woman who would tolerate me rather than wait for someone who loved me. What was no doubt inevitable finally happened. A year ago, I met a young woman and fell in love. Amazingly, the feeling was returned. We had an affair and although I was mad about her, I finally decided to do the "right thing", breaking off the relationship and staying with my wife. She knows about the affair and how it ended, and we are now back to living like dutiful Alphans. We're even going to try for another child.
The above scenario of my life might sound like a perfect illustration of Confucius's views. Provided of course, I added something about how glad I am that I took the moral option and how much stronger my marriage is following my affair. But that would be a lie. I'm just as miserable and discontent now as I was before. The only difference is that I now know what it would be like to be with a woman I really love.
So there's my contribution to this discussion about infidelity. There are no easy answers. Eagle 69 was miserable because his/her spouse was unfaithful. I'm miserable because I'm not. My only consolation is that I can pat myself on the back for being such a self-sacrificing Alphan.
From: alias "T.E. Lawrence"
Hello "Marcia",
I just thought I would skip all the fray on the "Private Lives" board (nothing like a candid confession to bring out the St.Nitouche, right?) and let you know that I was touched by your candor. You had to choose between love and duty and you were at least frank about how difficult the choice was.
Thank you very much for writing to give me your support. I've actually been surprised by the number of people who have written both publicly and privately about this. I thought I would get nothing but moralistic finger-wagging from the likes of Confucius, but it's good to know that so many of our fellow Alphans are able to view the issue impartially. Of course, the fact that I stayed with my wife has no doubt earned me a lot of Brownie points too. The main reason was that I didn't want to leave my children.
Just out of curiosity, what happened to the woman you were seeing?
She has now met someone else and seems happy from what I've heard.
T.E.L.
From: alias "T.E. Lawrence"
Dear Marcia,
It would be easy for me to finger-wag, since I also married young and I've never had cause to regret it. I love my husband and children very much. But I realise we were just lucky. To be honest, I know more people in your situation than in mine.
You are indeed lucky. I know plenty of happy couples too (perhaps I even know you!), as well as unhappy ones. I don't think you can set rules as to when people should marry or what kind of situation will make them happy in the long run. I have to admit that I don't know many idiots like myself who married people they didn't even think they were in love with. To mistake lust for love is one thing. To replace love with logic is another.
I have some friends who were in your situation. The husband cheated on his wife pretty openly and they ended up divorced. They started out well enough, but everything went wrong when they decided to settle down. What they had in common was drinking and partying; I don't think they had that much to say to each other after-hours.
Sounds like a familiar story. I have a friend who married a few months ago and who I think is in the same kind of situation. She and her boyfriend married because she was pregnant (the usual old routine) and I have a feeling they're doomed to failure. She had a major case of cold feet before the wedding and although everything seems cosy now that they have the baby, I think he's a lot more enthusiastic than she is. It makes me sad to see other people possibly putting themselves in the same situation as I have. But as an old friend used to say "You can't stop people from making mistakes". A variation on the old adage "Errare humanum est".
Anyway, I don't intend to spend the rest of my life lamenting my fate. My wife thinks she may be expecting a child and I'm determined to make the most of what we have, even if it's hypocritical to pretend this is what I always wanted. Perhaps as a married woman, you have some recipes for success to share with me?
T.E.L.
From: alias "T.E. Lawrence"
Dear Marcia,
Congratulations on the baby. Your obvious lack of enthusiasm for its mother notwithstanding, this is a good opportunity to "make the most" of it as you said. Who knows, things might improve?
Thank you for the congratulations. My wife has done a pregnancy test and we'll definitely be having another child next April. You're right that things are improving. To be honest, expanding our family was a major point of contention between us, and now that I've given in to her point of view, my wife is a lot nicer to me. It makes me realise that I wasn't the only one misbehaving in our marriage.
I have to say that the fact that we have many children is a help too, as we're rarely alone together and we interact very well when the children are around. My wife really loves children and has taken a job caring for them, leaving her previous job to someone else. I think she was very frustrated in her previous job and this was placing an additional strain on our marriage.
Your child will probably have one of mine as its close contemporary. Our youngest has just celebrated his first birthday, and that's usually when my husband and I start thinking about having another one. We're very organised! I sometimes wonder when we'll decide we have enough children.
I sometimes wonder how many is enough? Should we just accept any number of children nature throws at us? Or limit our fertility to the number of children each set of parents can realistically take good care of with respect to individual attention and support? I know most people nowadays argue that everyone should have at least three children because of the need to complement, replace and expand previous generations. But how far should we go after that?
My wife seems happy to have as many children as nature will give her, but with five children running around the home and another one on the way, I'm beginning to realise that I only really know a couple of my children. The loudest or most needy at that. I just don't get a chance to know the others. I'm having children I don't have time to take care of, and that makes me feel guilty. It's one reason why I disagreed with my wife about having more. I gave in for the sake of the marriage, which I wanted to preserve for the sake of the children. But I feel we may just be bringing children into an existence where they will be ignored by their parents.
From the sound of things, your friend is making a mistake. I can't really judge because I only have your word for it. For the record, my husband and I also married because I was pregnant. On the other hand, I became pregnant mainly because we wanted to marry.
According to what you said in your message, it sounds as if you and your husband had it all worked out. You were very organised from the start. I'm not sure I understand why your respective parents were against the match if you'd already been going out for two years. On the other hand, I know parents can take a strange view of their children's partners for reasons which the children (or anyone else) don't understand.
As to my friend, you're right: I'm probably not a very reliable source, because she is a close collaborator of mine and I may tend to be over-protective of her. What I can say is that the pregnancy definitely wasn't planned and she definitely had a major case of cold feet before finally deciding to marry him. She'd been going out with him for a few months before they presumably conceived the child, and I remember thinking it was strange that she never mentioned him. Still, I can only hope that things will turn out well in the end.
I have no sure-fire recipes for you. My husband and I have always enjoyed each other's company, so there's no particular effort involved in living together. We always make a point of handing over the kids to various relatives for short periods of time so that we can be alone together, either staying in the flat or going out to eat or dance. We also have a varied sex life, something which I believe is a big plus in any relationship.
If this a recipe for success, then my wife and I are a disaster! We're both making an effort these days, but once the conversation drifts off the children, we don't have much to say to each other. She doesn't want to hear about my work and I'm not madly interested in hearing about the children she works with. The truth is that I'm not interested in her. Everything my girlfriend told me last year fascinated me, even if she was just describing how a washing-machine had broken down. But for all our efforts, I find my wife profoundly boring and I think the feeling is mutual.
We went out to dinner for my birthday last month and it was fortunate our eldest daughter has just discovered a passion for acting, because otherwise we would have had very little to talk about. As to our sex life, I'm afraid that's limited to the bare necessities of child conception (and those necessities are really bare!). I was hoping that my affair would inspire my wife to find out why I had preferred to sleep with this other woman, but if anything it has made her even more reluctant to do anything creative, her attitude being "is that what you used to do with your floozy?". To be honest, I think my wife has some kind of mental block about sex. It goes so far that she tenses if I even try to kiss her neck. It's not helped by the fact I don't particularly want to kiss her anyway. The pregnancy gives us both an excuse to keep to our sides of the bed.
Thank you very much for listening to my lamentations,
T.E.L.
From: alias "T.E. Lawrence"
Dear Marcia,
I feel that we have enough support outside the family for all our children to get individual attention. They don't necessarily always get it from us, but then parents aren't the only ones who can give children love and affection. The children will grow up happy and fulfilled as long as they know they have the consistent affection and approbation of at least one adult.
I still feel, in the case of my own family at least, that it's best for the children if they can get that affection from their parents. From what you said in a previous message, you were keen to leave your parents' home because you felt that they were ignoring you. I naturally can't judge what kind of relationship you and your husband have with your children, but there might be a chance one of your children might feel the same way as you did. But as I said, that's how I feel about my own children, and I won't presume to pass judgement on your family when I don't even know who you are (and am happy to keep it that way).
The two families had different religions and that was probably a big problem, even though our parents aren't practising religionists. Also there was a simple personality conflict. My parents don't like my husband and my parents-in-law were pretty wary of me initially too. It's all a lot easier now.
Time doing its healing bit as usual, I presume. At least my wife and I have no family feuds to contend with. We make up our own complications!
Oh dear. "Boring" sounds bad. At least if you were fighting all the time, it could be taken as a sign of hidden passion, but "boring" sounds pretty hopeless as far as kindling a romance is concerned. On the other hand, you and your wife have a starting point with the fact you're both interested in your children. With six children, that should give you plenty to talk about.
That's a very sensible way of seeing things. I'm glad I have you to talk to, because you strike me as a very logical person. Yes, I am going to make the most of the fact that my wife and I do have something to talk about. The upcoming baby is a good subject of conversation and all the others are developing their own personalities, pursuing their own hobbies and gradually starting to turn into the people they will eventually become when they grow up. You're right, my wife and I do have plenty to keep us busy. To be honest, I think that's why I realised staying with my wife was the best solution, since it's better for the children, and bearable for me.
I loved your description of how you feel in the latter half of your pregnancies. No wonder you and your husband are keen to have more children! (lucky bastard) I'm afraid there's no hope of my wife miraculously developing a sex drive of any kind at any point. I'd have noticed it when she was pregnant before.
Still, we seem to have reached a certain level of comfort with the children and our life together. I also feel better knowing that I can talk about my life to someone. We'll just have to wait and see how things turn out...
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 19:36 16-Feb-Y28
Subject: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 14:19 25-Feb-Y28
Subject: Re: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 09:29 30-Feb-Y28
Subject: Re: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 12:13 05-Mar-Y28
Subject: Re: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 16:41 11-Mar-Y28
Subject: Re: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 21:05 25-Mar-Y28
Subject: Re: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 09:35 01-Apr-Y28
Subject: Re: Congratulations
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 15:06 12-Apr-Y28
Subject: Re: Uwe Karim Vincent
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 15:06 18-Apr-Y28
Subject: Re: Fathers
To: Blackmore-Lameroux, Brenda Maureen - AF0606-0005
Date: 23:58 29-Apr-Y28
Subject: Re: Fathers
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 01:05 06-May-Y28
Subject: Re: Yo! Ugly Mug!
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 11:51 08-May-Y28
Subject: Re: Yo! Ugly Mug!
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 09:01 09-May-Y28
Subject: Marriage
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 22:11 09-May-Y28
Subject: Change of plan
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 22:11 12-May-Y28
Subject: Re: Marriage, Change of plan etc
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 22:11 15-May-Y28
Subject: Re: Marriage, Change of plan etc
To: Collins, Rebecca - AF0905-0001
Date: 12:25 18-May-Y28
Subject: Re: Marriage, Change of plan etc
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 11:56 27-Jun-Y28
Subject: Re: Becky's wedding
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 24:06 01-Jul-Y28
Subject: Re: Becky's wedding
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 16:34 11-Jul-Y28
Subject: Your message
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 19:45 12-Jul-Y28
Subject: Re: Your message
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 20:05 18-Jul-Y28
Subject: Re: Your message
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 10:46 03-Aug-Y28
Subject: Re: Your message
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 15:46 11-Aug-Y28
Subject: Re: Joyeux Anniversaire !
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 17:31 17-Aug-Y28
Subject: Re: Joyeux Anniversaire !
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 21:01 25-Aug-Y28
Subject: Re: Investigation Results
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 11:14 29-Aug-Y28
Subject: Re: Idiot boyfriends
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 11:14 02-Sep-Y28
Subject: Re: Idiot boyfriends
To: Habibi, Aisha Tiziana - AF0806-0003
Date: 21:14 12-Oct-Y28
Subject: Re: Idiot boyfriends
To: alias "Clark Kent"; alias "Nina Hagen"; alias "Confucius"; alias "Eagle 69"
Copy: Private Lives Moderator
Forum: Private Lives (restricted)
Date: 23:56 27-Aug-Y28
Subject: Re: Adultery
To: alias "Marcia Brady"
Date: 00:05 01-Sep-Y28
Subject: Re: Adultery
To: alias "Marcia Brady"
Date: 00:05 09-Sep-Y28
Subject: Re: Adultery
To: alias "Marcia Brady"
Date: 00:05 16-Sep-Y28
Subject: Re: Adultery
To: alias "Marcia Brady"
Date: 22:25 29-Sep-Y28
Subject: Re: Adultery
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