Under The Influence
By Amanda Russell
Unable to stop grinning whenever he thought of the move they were about to make, Victor Bergman sat in the chair usually occupied by John Koenig and casually studied the reports he held. He didn't really need to bother; computer assured him everything would be fine, as verified by the computer on Piri. Conditions on the planet were exactly what the Alphans needed. Everyone was more than happy to help with the move, there weren't any problems. Well, maybe just one problem. John Koenig.
Victor swiveled dreamily in the chair, aware of how comfortable it was. Behind him the door to John's office opened and Helena Russell sauntered in.
"Well, John is conscious again, but computer says he's being as pig-headed as ever." Her voice was light and playful, her mood outwardly carefree as she boosted herself up to sit on John's desk, allowing her legs to dangle over the edge. Victor watched her, thinking about John.
"A few days of solitude will soon set him straight," Victor offered.
Helena shrugged her shoulders, not overly concerned. That was the nice thing about this move to Piri. Everything was going to be fine and she really had little to be worried about. Except John. Helena frowned at the thought of John being so stubborn.
"He's so inflexible. Let's not take him."
Helena pouted a moment, then lifted her legs up so she could rest them on the desk, stretched out before her. She leaned back on her arms. Victor turned the chair back toward her, a slight frown on his face.
"Oh, he'll want to come... Let's leave him an Eagle. Then he can join us when he's ready," Bergman suggested. He nodded once, certain that was the way to handle John. There, that problem solved.
He swiveled the chair away from Helena again, so he was facing Main Mission. Behind him, Helena sat up straight and leaned forward to rest her arms on the back of the chair.
"Okay," she agreed cheerfully.
She too believed that problem was solved and could now turn her mind to other things. Her gaze rested on the top of Victor's head and she took a deep breath. Helena lifted one hand and traced a finger lightly over the top of the professor's balding head. It was a gentle caress, one that caused a reaction Helena had not expected, but welcomed.
Victor leaned back further against the chair, a sigh of contented pleasure escaping him. "Mhmmmm, that feels... nice."
His eyes were closed in enjoyment. Helena smiled with pleasure. She continued to stroke the top of Victor's head, feeling her own reaction become more intense. She was going to have to do something about it.
"Does this make you feel good, Victor?" she wanted to know.
"Hmmmm, very much so," he replied dreamily.
Helena slipped off the edge of the desk and turned the chair around so Victor faced her. She bent close, hands resting on his shoulders. Her fingers gently caressed the side of his neck, the lobe of his ear. Victor's eyes opened to meet Helena's teasing gaze.
"I can make you feel even better. Would you like that?"
Bergman inhaled deeply and nodded. Helena smiled. She leaned across him, her breasts brushing against his cheek. Helena touched the control button that would close and lock all the office doors. Victor's eyes went wide with anticipation. Helena eased back and took his hands. She pulled him to his feet and led him away from the desk, down the steps and over to the couch.
Victor smiled dumbly, only beginning to imagine what Helena had in mind. Neither he nor Helena were able to comprehend they were under the influence of the Piri computer; their judgment had been impaired and all their inhibitions neutralized. All they understood or cared about was that they wanted this to happen. It would be enjoyable, it would bring them pleasure, and it would be really, really fun.
Helena eased him down to the couch and stood before him. Slowly she began to undress, removing her utility belt, her boots and uniform slacks. Her tunic came off slowly. Helena stood before Victor in bra and panties, watching him, smiling and trying not to giggle. He reached out for her but Helena shook her head. She knelt before him and slowly removed his uniform belt, allowing her hands to stray along his chest and down to his groin. Helena met Victor's eyes, then giggled and looked away. Bergman groaned at her touch, reaching out to caress her shoulders, to massage her breast through the fabric of her bra. He felt her nipple harden and caught it between his thumb and forefinger. His eyes flashed with delight as he grinned just like a small child discovering the pleasures of a new toy for the first time. With his free hand, Victor guided Helena's hands back to his groin.
Helena shook her head and stood. She brought Victor to his feet and quickly lowered his trousers and underpants with one motion. He stared at her a moment, then removed his tunic, tossing it aside. He reached for her again and Helena stepped close, allowing Victor to run his hands across her belly and up her sides. He worked his fingers under the bottom elastic band of her bra, massaging each breast to arousal. Helena pulled in a slow breath and placed a deep kiss on Victor's mouth. Her tongue touched his and explored the inside of his mouth. She smiled and giggled with delight when she felt Bergman's erection pressing against her crotch. Her panties were still in the way and she stepped back, Victor's hands still at her breasts. Helena slipped her panties off, kicking them aside. She pushed Victor back down to the couch, leaning toward him as her breasts pressed into his hands. Their gazes met again. Helena smiled playfully, reached up and unhooked her bra. She removed it slowly, Victor never once releasing her breasts, her nipples scissored between his fingers.
Finally ready to release one breast, Victor used that hand to reach around Helena's waist and pull her down to the couch. He tried to turn her under him, but she had other things in mind. Helena pushed against Victor's chest until he was stretched full length on the couch. She moved over him, positioned so her breasts dangled just above his mouth. Victor reached out and grasped a breast, pulling it down toward his mouth, his teeth capturing the nipple. Helena pulled in a hissed breath and giggled when she met his gaze, her hair falling into her face. She tossed her hair back and allowed Victor to suckle at her breast while his fingers manipulated the other one. Victor's other hand playfully explored her torso, caressed the outside of her thighs and probed between her legs. Helena gasped when his fingers found her erectile tissue. She pushed herself down onto his hand and he released her breast from his mouth as she bent close to kiss him. Helena adjusted her position so she was straddling Victor, her knees on either side of his hips, giving his fingers better access to her private area.
While he played with her, Helena watched Victor's face, one hand stroking the top of his bald head. She smiled with delight and gasped a little when she felt Victor slip one finger past her tight vaginal muscles. He continued his internal stimulation of her until Helena felt a tingle begin inside and surge through her. She bit her bottom lip and pulled in a hissing breath, her eyes closing as pleasure overtook her senses. As the feeling began to subside, Helena slowly opened her eyes and grinned down at Victor with a sultry, satisfied gaze.
Disengaging Bergman's fingers from between her legs, Helena maintained eye contact with him as she rose up on her knees and moved backward. She kept her legs on either side of Victor, but now had his outstretched legs straddled between her knees. Breaking eye contact, Helena allowed her gaze to wander down his nude body, finally lingering on his erect penis. Slowly Helena reached for it and gently wrapped her fingers around it. She giggled. It was hard and ready for her, but Helena knew she could improve its condition. She gave it a gentle squeeze and Victor met her gaze when she looked up toward his face. He chuckled when he saw her playful expression.
Victor folded his arms under his head and rested them against the arm of the couch, raising his head and shoulders enough so he could watch what Helena planned to do. She smiled, and with her fingers still wrapped around his penis, Helena moved her hips forward, spreading her thighs more widely. She lowered her hips, bringing her vaginal opening closer to his shaft, almost touching the head of his penis with her vaginal lips. Victor pulled in a deep breath of anticipation and arched his hips upward, anxious for contact. Helena just smiled and shook her head. She moved her hips again, and once more backed up a bit so that she knelt over Victor's straightened knees. Slowly she bent at the waist, her gaze locked with Victor's, and brought her mouth down close to his penis. Bergman's eyes went wide, he smiled and jerked his hips upward.
"Saucy wench," he stated, his British accent making the words sound very sensuous.
She laughed gaily and lowered her mouth to his penis. The tip of her tongue touched the end of his organ and Bergman sucked in a deep breath. He raised his head from the arm of the couch just enough so he could watch as Helena slowly licked his shaft. Her tongue darted in and out, her gaze locked with Victor's, pure enjoyment reflected in her eyes. Finally, slowly, deliberately, playfully, Helena placed her lips around the end of his penis and began to take him into her mouth. She allowed her tongue to gently caress the head and sides of his shaft. Bergman reached down with both hands to grab her head, urging her further down, wanting her to take all of him into her mouth. He could feel her smile around his shaft, and he moaned when her fingers caressed his testicles. Victor knew he couldn't hold back much longer.
Helena sensed Victor was about to climax. She slowly raised her head, her mouth sucking his penis, her teeth nipping the end of it as she released him.
"No..."
He tried to push her mouth back down to his aching penis, but Helena had already changed her position, crawling forward. She straddled him, placing herself over his hard, throbbing, about to erupt penis. Slowly Helena lowered herself onto Victor, gasping at the moment of penetration. He was inside her. Victor thrust upward, pushing himself into Helena more deeply. Her vaginal muscles tightened around him and she eased all the way down. Then she sat still for a moment, smiling, breathing slowly, getting used to the feel of him inside her, of herself stretched tightly about him.
Watching Helena closely, Victor reached down to touch her erectile tissue again. She jerked at the contact and began to rock her hips, making his penetration more complete. She cried out in something between pain and ecstasy. Her vaginal muscles tightened around him again and Victor exploded within her, his cry of release mingling with Helena's laugh of orgasmic delight.
Still hard, still inside Helena, and far from finished with her, Victor opened his eyes to meet Helena's gaze. She bent close and kissed him deeply. He responded by reaching between them to rub her gently. Helena gasped and Victor used that moment of distraction on Helena's part to roll them off the couch. They landed on the floor, the impact causing him to push into Helena further. She cried out in pleasure and again met Victor's gaze. He chuckled, raising up from her chest enough to cup one breast in his hand. As his fingers manipulated her flesh, Helena laughed lightly and her eyes grew wide. He was on top now, he was in control, and he would be the dominant partner.
Helena relaxed as best she could, and with one look let Victor know she was his to do with as he liked. He laughed deeply and bent to capture the other breast in his mouth. Helena tried to move her hips to increase the depth of his penetration, but he sucked hard on her nipple to let her know this was his game, his rules. Helena lay still and let Victor have his way.
Bergman kissed, sucked and massaged Helena's breasts. He heard her breath catch in her throat more than once, and only when she moaned in need did he begin to move his hips, thrusting in and out of her slowly.
Helena bent her legs at the knees, raising them to give Victor better penetration as he thrust between her legs. She gasped when she felt him go deeper, his balls brushing against her pubic hair. His thrusts were slow and deliberate, designed to make her frantic for more. But he would not be rushed. Finally, when Helena thought she would scream in frustration, Victor began to thrust more quickly. Helena wrapped her legs around his torso, her heels pressing into his buttocks, adding strength and depth to his thrusts. Just as she was about to climax, Victor's fingers found her clitoris again. He rubbed her hard, in time with his thrusts. Helena felt herself lose all control and the orgasmic sensation engulfed her.
Arching his back, pushing into Helena as far as he could, Victor reached his own climax seconds after Helena. He exploded inside her, his hands squeezing her breasts, mirroring Helena's vaginal muscles as they tightened around his penis. So much for the theory of his mechanical heart not being able to adapt to the demands of sex...
Bergman rolled off Helena and lay on the floor. She moaned as he withdrew from her and closed her eyes. Helena turned her head toward Victor and opened her eyes again. She smiled. "Did you have fun?"
"Oh, yes," Bergman replied with a satisfied grin. ÒIt has been ages since I had this much fun, my dear.Ó
Helena giggled, then sat up. She looked around for her clothes, and found everything but her panties. She shrugged and got dressed. Victor did the same, then wandered back over toward John's desk. He released the locks on the doors and checked the status of Operation Exodus.
"Hey, the Eagles are loading. I'll race you!" Bergman laughed as he opened the isolation door and started down the steps into Main Mission. Helena dashed after him.
"No fair! You had a head start," she called as she chased him through Main Mission.
They arrived at the launch pad and boarded the last Eagle moments before it left the moon.
As the last Eagle lifted from the launch pad, the security lock on John Koenig's quarters was released. His door opened and he was free to roam the deserted hallways of Moonbase Alpha.
The closer the Eagles drew to Piri, the more passive and lethargic the Alphans became. Inhibitions continued to fade, to be replaced by apathy. Men shed their tunics. Women changed from their uniforms into Alphan leisure wear, unmindful of privacy or modesty. When they set foot on Piri, each Alphan found a place to be, and stayed there. Most simply stared ahead of them, into the bright, mind numbing light of Piri. Some, who were stronger of will or had more resistance to complete control, were able to interact with one another in a very limited way, such as brief conversations.
Victor and Helena lounged next to each other, resting against a Piri tree. They occasionally exchanged a few words, but mostly allowed their minds to wander, to accept the calming, peaceful signals sent to everyone by the controlling force on Piri. Neither gave a thought to what they had done just before leaving Alpha. It was in the past and bore no relevance to their life on Piri. Such physical needs were no longer a part of them. They were moving toward perfection.
They had not yet attained total perfection when John Koenig landed on Piri. Helena felt herself react to his nearness, his presence, with excitement, anticipation and a bit of modesty. She closed her robe and tied the belt around her waist. It was the most she had done - physically or mentally - since coming to Piri. The sensations of her time with Victor were still with her when John pulled her aside and into the Eagle. Helena's mind, controlled as it was, could not really process what she was recalling. She knew it had been fun, she knew she had liked it, and she knew that with John it would be even better. She'd always liked him, she thought about him a lot, and now he wanted to be alone with her, in private, behind closed doors. Helena giggled, happy to go with John.
The electrical shocks broke into Helena's lethargic mind. She realized Piri had nothing to offer the Alphans but a slow, empty death. With her help, John was able to break the control Piri had on all the Alphans. They returned to the moon, Piri lost to them, even though the stasis had been broken and the planet was once again a living world.
Helena ordered that medical exams for every Alphan be conducted. None experienced any lasting effects from being under the influence of the Piri computer, although many felt a sense of loss at having that peace of mind withdrawn so quickly. Several Alphans were injured in their rush to return to the Eagles and leave the planet. Helena had just finished logging the injuries and up-dating patient files when she sensed someone nearby. She looked up and found Victor Bergman standing in her office doorway. His gaze was downcast and Helena quickly averted her eyes as she felt herself flush. While on their way back from Piri she remembered her activities with Victor, in John's office, before they left Alpha, but had been too busy with patients to deal with her own needs. Now was the time to do so. "... Victor."
"Hello, Helena. I... believe we must talk."
"Yes." She nodded and reached to close her office door. She hesitated a moment before touching the correct button, but knew the need for privacy was stronger than her feelings of discomfort at being alone in a locked room with Victor. They needed to talk, and without the chance that any portion of their conversation might be overheard.
Victor stepped into the office and glanced behind himself as the door closed. He looked at the chair Helena offered but shook his head. "No, thank you. I'm... I'd better stand."
"I understand... Victor, I... don't know what to say...," Helena began.
He took a deep breath and released it slowly. He had always thought of Helena as a friend, as someone whom he trusted completely, and he knew she was in love with his best friend, John Koenig. But if Victor were completely honest with himself, he would have to admit that somewhere, deep inside, he was also attracted to Helena as a woman. That made this all more difficult, made his feelings of guilt more acute. And there was one thing he had to know right away. "Helena, I must ask you something. Perhaps it is too soon for you to know, but, is there a chance that... Could you have become pregnant because of what transpired between us?"
She could see the panic and dread cross Victor's face when he asked, when he even considered the possibility and she gently shook her head. "No, Victor, I didn't become pregnant. Due to the need to keep Alpha's population constant, birth control measures have been made mandatory."
He released a deep sigh of relief and shook his head, the dark humor of the situation very apparent to him. "This is not the kind of conversation I ever expected to have with a dear and trusted friend, with you."
She relaxed slightly, sat back and glanced up at Victor. "Nor did I... Although we were under the influence of a mind-altering substance, the Piri computer, we still..."
"Behaved like a couple of extremely inebriated youngsters with a care for nothing but our own pleasure?" Bergman finished.
"Yes. Our ability to use good judgment and to rely on certain well placed inhibitions to control social behavior and basic urges was stripped from us. We cannot be held responsible for our actions; no one can be under these circumstances," Helena stated, trying to be detached and clinical.
"That is little comfort when I recall the details of our... encounter," said Victor as he tried not to squirm uncomfortably.
Helena nodded her agreement. "I know. Victor, you too are a dear and treasured friend. I don't know quite how we are going to handle this, but I don't want to lose your friendship because... we went at each other like a couple of rutting animals."
"Nor do I wish to lose your friendship, Helena. But the guilt I feel because of our actions is almost... overwhelming."
Helena studied Victor closely for a moment, then stood and joined him in front of her desk. She placed her hand on his arm and met his gaze. "I feel that as well, Victor, but we should not. We were being controlled, manipulated, made to accept and believe information that was false. Our ability to distinguish between what was real and what was fabrication had been taken from us - without our knowledge or consent. We acted irresponsibly because - at that point - we didn't know any better and were not permitted to care even if we could have made the distinction. Everyone on Alpha was used as a pawn in a game in which we were forced to participate. We are all victims. The guilt and shame we feel, while real, is not completely justifiable. Our reasoning ability was impaired and we were not given the choice - the opportunity - to refuse to participate. The fact that sex was involved - for us - makes those feelings even stronger because sex can make these feeling more intense...," Helena explained, making certain she did not look away from Victor Bergman.
"Had we been sexually attracted to one another before this, the guilt we feel now wouldn't be as acute?" Victor asked.
"Yes," was HelenaÕs reply.
"But because I had intercourse with a woman who, although she is my friend, is attracted to someone else who is also a friend, the guilt is worse?"
"Yes, because along with that guilt, you, and I are experiencing feelings of betrayal as well," she told him.
Victor met Helena's gaze, then sighed and sank into the nearby chair. He rested his elbows on his knees, pressing the heels of his hands against his closed eyes. "I don't know as I can face John..."
Helena moved to stand by the chair, then knelt. She gently took Victor's hands in hers, easing them away from his face. "We have to, Victor. More than anyone else, I think John will understand. He alone saw how we were all manipulated and influenced. He tried to make us see it, to understand it, but we couldn't; we weren't allowed to process any information other than what the Guardian wanted us to process and accept unquestioningly. He will understand."
"But will he forgive us?"
"...I think so. I hope so," Helena replied softly.
"Do you want to be the one to tell him, to risk his anger...?"
Helena glanced down and released her grasp of Victor's hands. She stood slowly, shaking her head. Then she looked down and met Victor's gaze. "No, but I will."
Victor studied Helena a moment, then stood. He stepped up to her and placed a gentle hand on her arm. "I can't let you face him alone. We should tell him together."
Helena shook her head. "No, Victor. I think... I think it will be better if I do tell him - alone. John will want to talk with each of us privately, and we need to make that as easy for him as we can."
Reluctantly Bergman nodded his agreement. He placed a gentle kiss on Helena's cheek, then left her office. Helena watched him go, releasing a deep sigh.
Koenig studied Helena as she stood by the direct vision port, staring out at the lunar surface. She had finished her report concerning the medical condition of everyone on Alpha, citing no lasting physical after effects as a result of the Pirian mind control. He sensed there was something more she wanted to tell him, but wasn't sure how to do it.
Rising from his place on the couch, John crossed to stand beside Helena, reaching out to grasp her shoulders and turn her to face him. He met her troubled gaze with a concerned one of his own. "What's wrong, Helena? Are you all right?"
"Yes, I'm fine, but..." Her voice trailed off and Helena looked down, away from John.
He took her hands and drew Helena back to the couch. They sat and she reluctantly met his gaze. There was no easy or gentle way to tell him what she had to say. Helena hoped she was right about John being understanding. She took a deep breath and released it slowly.
"John, you recognized and understood what effects the Piri computer was having on us; the way it was able to influence our minds and control our thought processes and our actions so that we... did things we normally would not do," Helena softly stated.
"Yes," he agreed, wondering what point she was trying to make.
Helena continued, "Because of that influence, that mind control, we were easily manipulated. Our common sense vanished, our sense of duty and responsibility was masked, and our inhibitions disappeared. Aspects of our personality, our every day behavior were altered and we allowed ourselves to unleash, to act on impulses and desires that we normally would have been able to control."
John nodded, watching as Helena took another deep breath. She was trying to calm herself and keep her voice steady. He swallowed, uncertain of where this might be going.
"That lack of inhibitions and built-in control checks affected each of us differently. Many just relaxed and had a good time, happy to not have to worry about anything for awhile. Others indulged behavior and engaged in activities in which they normally would not participate. For many those activities were of a sexual nature. Libidos took over, the sex drive was dominant and all consuming... Nothing mattered expect the overwhelming need to fulfill that desire, that drive for sexual intercourse."
Helena paused, glancing down at her hands as John continued to hold them. She wanted to pull away, wanted to break their physical contact, but couldn't. Instead she met John's gaze again when he gave her hands a gentle squeeze. "Helena...?"
"John, Victor and I were among those whose libidos were out of control," she said flatly.
"What?" Helena couldnÕt be telling him what he thought she was saying – could she?
"We had sex with each other, John. One moment we were discussing plans for Operation Exodus and the next..." Helena let her voice trail off, not wanting to provide details. John stared at her for a moment, eyes wide, mouth open in shock. He blinked and released her hands. He stood and paced away, then stood still and turned to face Helena.
"You and Victor?"
"Yes." Helena didn't try to explain further or rationalize their behavior. John knew the circumstances. He would either understand and forgive them, or he would be so hurt and jealous and angry that nothing could put things right between them.
John stared at Helena for a long moment, then turned away. A wave of jealousy shot through him, followed by intense anger. He took a deep breath to control both emotions. John was jealous and upset that it had been Victor having sex with Helena and not himself, and angry that his friend and the woman he was in love with had been manipulated to the point where they would engage in activities they normally would not consider -- having sex with each other. Victor and Helena were friends. They trusted each other and valued the friendship they shared. There had never been any sexual attraction between them, and with no warning, because of the mind altering influence of the Piri computer, they had found themselves more intimately involved than either had ever thought possible.
Slowly John turned back to face Helena. She sat quietly, her gaze resting on some spot on the floor. She sensed him watching her but did not look up. "I had to tell you, John, even though we... I couldn't keep this from you. I have never thought of Victor as a sexual partner. He is a friend, I trust him, I love him, but... I'm not in love with him. We had sex, nothing more. He isn't you, he isn't the man I want to make love with, or to be with for the rest of my life."
Helena looked up and finally met John's gaze. She watched while John studied her, then he slowly came back to the couch and sat beside her. He reached out and took her hands again. Helena could see all the questions he wanted to ask flashing through his mind, questions that would only hurt them both. He didn't ask any of them.
"I... I don't know what to say, Helena. Neither of you can be held responsible for what happened while you were being manipulated and controlled by that Piri computer, I know that," he stated, his voice tight with controlled anger and hurt.
Helena squeezed JohnÕs hands and shook her head. "No, we can't, but that doesn't make the guilt any easier to deal with or lessen our sense of having betrayed you," she said quietly.
Tears were beginning to form in Helena's eyes. She pulled in a ragged breath, needing to cry but unwilling to allow herself to do so. John raised his hand to touch Helena's neck, to caress her cheek with his finger.
"You did nothing to feel guilty about. You did not betray me, Helena, neither did Victor. I wish this had never happened, I wish you had never been forced to... abandon everything that keeps us in control and human. I wish it had been me instead of Victor, but... it wasn't. So it was fortunate that Victor was your partner. I know he was kind to you and did nothing... out of line given the circumstances. He could never hurt you."
Helena raised a hand to cover her mouth as she fought back tears and a sob. She released several short breaths and swallowed hard. The tears came anyway and she began to cry. "I am so sorry, John...."
He pulled her into his embrace and held her close, allowing her to cry. When the sobs ceased and she grew quiet, John eased Helena back so he could meet her gaze. "You and Victor are the two most important people in my life. I'm not going to let something that was beyond your control - our control - ruin a friendship I have valued for years or to... interfere with what I feel for you. I love you, nothing will change that, Helena. And when you're ready,... I will be the man making love with you, the one who will be with you for the rest of our lives."
Tears came back to Helena's eyes. John drew her to him and placed a loving kiss on her mouth, one filled with compassion, forgiveness and a promise of what was to come when they were ready. John ended the kiss and eased back to meet Helena's gaze. She swallowed hard again, then nodded.
"Thank you, John."
He kissed her lightly in reply.
"I'd better go talk with Victor," Koenig said.
"Yes. He's... not dealing with this any better than I am... was," Helena confessed.
"We'll work it out, Helena. I do love you."
"I know... John, I can't promise anything, but... I don't think it will be much longer before I'm ready." John smiled, kissed her cheek, then stood. Helena watched while he left his office to find Victor. She sighed heavily, then slowly smiled.
The door to Victor Bergman's lab opened and John entered, meeting his friend's gaze when Bergman looked up from his work. "John," he stood to greet his friend nervously.
"Hello, Victor. I've just come from talking with Helena."
"I see. She told you then? John, had I been... myself...," Bergman began.
"Had you been yourself, you would have seen what was happening and... none of what we experienced because of Piri would have gotten to the point it did," John stated firmly.
"I keep looking back, wondering when I lost control, when I came under the influence of the Piri computer," the professor commented.
"I think when you were in Medical Center, after you passed out due to the lower oxygen levels. From that point on, you were not yourself. You were too willing to accept things as an accomplished fact and unwilling - perhaps unable - to question data and apparent facts that were exactly what we needed and wanted to hear, facts of which you would normally have been very skeptical," Koenig stated, his expression slightly angry.
"It's frightening, John, to know all your logic and self control can be so easily overcome, without your even being aware of it. John, you know that I think you and Helena are good for one another, that I'm overjoyed you have found each other and fallen in love with each other in the middle of this... insanity. I will always regret my actions, and hope you can forgive my... betrayal of our friendship, and Helena's love for you. I think, with time and distance, Helena and I will be all right, and will come to terms with what we were forced to do. Will you?" Bergman added.
John had been watching Victor and now glanced down at his hands. He nodded once.
"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't angry, Victor. Not with you and Helena, but with the situation, the circumstances that... compelled you into a situation of which you had no control, no desire to resist. I'm angry at the whole series of events and angry that I wasn't able to stop them sooner. I know I did all I could, and the anger will fade. No one is to blame, or at fault or can be held accountable, not even the Pirian computer. It was simply trying to carry out its programming. I'd also be lying if I said I wasn't jealous of you, Victor. You have shared an experience with Helena that... I have not. But that too is not your fault, or Helena's or mine. We simply had no control over what happened, what we did, and... we have to live with it. We have to make the best of it and we cannot let it ruin the friendship and love we share."
John held his hand out to Victor, who took it. They shook, then Victor put a hand on John's shoulder. They met each other's gaze and each man nodded once, in affirmation. John turned and started back toward the lab door, but stopped when Victor spoke. "John,... is Helena all right?"
Koenig turned to face his friend and nodded. "Yes, she is. As you said, it will take time and distance, but... she's all right for now."
Victor also nodded and smiled ruefully. "She's a strong woman, perhaps stronger than either of us knows... John, that experience Helena and I shared... You and she will too, soon. And it will mean everything to both of you because it will be more than just sex, because you are in love with each other. It will happen, John," Victor assured.
"I know it will, Victor. When we're both ready, when we're both making our own decisions and not being controlled by some outside influence."
John glanced down, smiled at his friend, then left. Bergman watched him leave, then turned back to his lab bench. He was determined to discover how the Piri computer, a mechanical, electronic device, had been able to manipulate and influence biological, self aware beings. Once they understood it, even in part, it would be easier for everyone to accept what happened and put it behind them. Victor wanted this for everyone on Alpha, but especially he wanted it for John, for Helena, and for himself.
January 3, 2001
Revised July 25, 2006
Copyright 2006, Lunatic Productions, Inc.
