Timeslip

by Ellen C. Lindow

The alarm was set to ring a half hour earlier than usual. Helena Russell slapped the commlock, turned over and touched John Koenig on the shoulder as he stirred. "It's early. You don't have to get up yet."

He mumbled a sleepy affirmative and reached to kiss her. She returned his kiss and slid out of his arms before he could move to detain her longer.

It was her turn for the monthly inspection of the remnants of Disposal Area Two, an EV activity she drew every three months and one which she dreaded. Although she had spent a lifetime learning the skills needed for a career in space, and she loved it, she had found that she hated space suits. She hated the smell, she hated the closeness and she hated hearing her breath echo around the helmet. She refused to let her feelings for space suits effect her behavior, and doubted anyone else knew how she felt. In an emergency, she could get into a suit as fast as the next person. It was the scheduled jobs that gave her a feeling of dread. Helena dealt with the problem by preparing thoroughly for any scheduled EV situations, arriving early and double checking the suit for any problems. She also preferred to start out as clean as possible, and with an empty stomach. She was not prone to motion sickness, but she didn't like to take chances. It was notoriously hard to get smells out of the suits.

She left the bathroom clean and dry and donned a black nylon flight suit and slip-on shoes, like diver's slippers, to be worn under the outer layer of the p-suit. It surprised her to find Koenig awake and gone, but she knew he had no patience for lying in bed half awake and had probably headed to the gym or an early breakfast.

The trip to the launch pad was quiet. People from first shift were just beginning to stir and third shift was not yet over. She arrived in the suit room to find Will Bates giving her suit's seals a final check.

"Hey, Doc, how's it going?" Will was a tall black man who dwarfed Helena. He had played basketball in college and he and Helena had worked part-time in the engineering department together as undergraduates. The two had flirted and teased each other since they were teenagers, attended each other's weddings, she was godmother to his third daughter, and he had shielded her from the press at her husband's memorial service, using a tall menacing black dude routine and a black accent so thick it had almost made her laugh.

"Since when did you start working third shift, Willie?" she asked with a smile, using the nickname he tolerated from no one but her.

"I'm just working a bit of overtime. Saw your name on the roster and thought I'd come in early and help out. You tend to intimidate my techs about these suits, you know."

Maybe her concerns about the suits were not so well hidden, she considered. Will had turned back to the suit and Helena joined him, grateful for the kindness of an old friend. She focused on checking out the suit and barely registered the arrival of another travel tube. Her pilot arrived and busied himself with his own suit. Will helped Helena into her suit, then turned to help the pilot while Helena plugged her suit into a computer console for a final check. Once computer gave her the green light, Will returned and unsealed her helmet.

"Everything check out to your satisfaction Doc?" he asked, looking down at her.

"Yes, it's fine," she answered, glad to be relieved of the helmet for the three hour trip to Area Two. "Thanks, Will."

"Have a good trip, Helena."

She nodded and boarded the Eagle. Sliding into the co-pilot's seat, she glanced at her pilot, then did a double take. "What are you doing here?"

"I needed some flight time and signed up to pilot your flight. Surprised?" Koenig asked with a smile.

Helena returned the smile. "Yes, and pleased. We don't get the chance to be alone very often, even when working."

"I agree," John replied as he began to prepare for flight. She settled into her co-pilot duties with ease and more than a little pleasure. She enjoyed flying almost as much as she hated that space suit.

The flight went smoothly and the work at the disposal site passed quickly. Helena usually scheduled six to eight hours for the checks but that was without assistance. Koenig had helped her write the procedures for the checks performed and they breezed through the check list together and were back inside the Eagle in a little over three hours.

"I expected this to take all day," Helena said as they helped each other remove their suits.

"Oh, I expect we can find something to do with our spare time. No one expects us back until morning." Koenig smiled at her. She returned the smile and put her arms around his neck. "Oh, I'm sure we can." She stepped into his embrace and delivered a long slow kiss with his enthusiastic participation.

They ate dinner, then made love on a pallet on the floor of the Eagle. Afterwards, they lay each others arms talking softly, drowsily. The pain hit her suddenly. In mid-sentence she gasped as pain gripped, her nerves firing all at once. Koenig's immediate reaction was to hold her closer. She became translucent, almost transparent as Koenig held on to her. His vision blurred, and he felt the pain too, as if he were being torn apart, cell by cell. He gasped for breath and held her tight, cheek to cheek, bodies pressed together.

Then the pain stopped. As suddenly as it had come, leaving them both exhausted and out of breath. They sat up together, exchanging a look that confirmed the experience they had shared and assured each other that they were undamaged quicker than words could convey the message. John touched her cheek and reached for his jumpsuit.

"Was that another space warp?" Helena asked, casting around for her own clothing.

"It didn't feel quite the same," Koenig replied. "But I think we should head back to Alpha in case whatever it was hit Alpha as well."

Still looking for her clothes, she nodded distractedly. "John, where's my jumpsuit?"

Zipping up his own jumpsuit, he gave an impatient glance around the cabin. "It should be right here. He reached for a locker and pulled out a clean package. "Here, put this on." His mind was already back on business. "We'll look for it later." He headed for the command module and pre-flight check. She watched him leave while hurriedly pulling on the new coverall.

"Yeah, right," she mumbled to herself. "You can go back and tell the service team to keep an eye out for Dr. Russell's underwear, since she managed to lose it out here." She knew the service crew would delight in the joke for weeks on end, but she hurried forward to her co-piloting duties. The Eagle's engines already whining in preparation for liftoff.

They flew fast and high in a parabolic jump designed to bring them within line of sight communication as fast as possible. Koenig left the flying to Helena and contacted the base as soon as they came over the horizon. He spoke to Sandra Benes. No, they had experienced no disorienting phenomenon. No, the computer detected no spatial distortions. No, medical center had not had any reports of perception problems or unexplained pain. Everything was fine. She had received a message from Professor Bergman's lab that progress had been made on the neutrino scanning device which the Alphans hoped would give them additional warning of any upcoming space warps. Koenig had been following the progress reports from Bergman's lab on the technology from the ship he and Tony had brought back through the space warp a few months before. Bergman's team of scientists had adopted the technology for use with other projects they had been running. Maya had also been spending time with them, exploring the technology they had accumulated through contacts with other races during the years they had traveled through space. Victor's team had been given free rein to investigate the potential such technology might have for the benefit of Alpha. Paul Morrow had transferred to the team as administrator and David Kano had volunteered to explore the interface between computer and these new components such as the salvage from Dione's ship, the neutrino transmitter which had failed to send them back to Earth, but might be useful in another situation, the memory cores from Brian the Brain and Voyager.

Thoughts of the neutrino device made Helena shiver, remembering their experience in 14th Century Scotland. As Koenig signed off and took the controls again he glanced at her and nodded. "It's a good bet that it had something to do with Victor's science team. We'll check there first." Helena smiled her agreement and they made preparations for landing.

Upon touchdown, they hurried through the post-flight check and Helena followed her impatient Commander through the boarding ramp and onto the travel tube. A crew was already waiting to board and service the Eagle. Although Helena usually insisted on storing her own space suit, she knew Koenig was waiting and hurried aboard the travel tube to the remote lab site without giving her suit a thought or a glance. It would be a while before they discovered that, like her jumpsuit, the space suit was also missing.

The lab was the center of physical activity for Bergman's project, although almost everyone on Alpha participated in the project through the computer. Each artifact had been catalogued and cross-referenced in the main computer and all information about the objects could be accessed and analyzed from any location on Alpha. For the scientists and technicians of Alpha, this was the interesting work they devoted their free time to, despite what duties they were assigned to do to keep Alpha running. The project ate computer memory with a voracious appetite, as fast as the technicians could grow it. David Kano was kept busy adding memory and organizing and re-organizing the data logically and efficiently.

Koenig and Russell were frequent visitors to the lab and Koenig was not surprised to find Sandra Benes already there. When her shift in Command Center was over, she was usually found here assisting Paul Morrow. Koenig had refused to lose her from the command team, no matter how badly Paul Morrow wanted her, but he couldn't stop her from volunteering her assistance after hours.

Sandra looked up from her data screen. "Commander, I've informed the professor about your concerns. He's expecting you in lab pod C."

Koenig nodded and strode down the hallway with Helena at his side. There were four people in the cluttered pod, all peering into a large framework which was surrounded by computer consoles. Tony Verdesschi was the first to look up from his position behind Maya who was seated at the main console. "John, take a look at this. We can see Earth in this thing!"

Koenig and Helena stepped closer. Bergman glanced up distractedly, "Yes, John. I believe we have managed to contact Earth." Victor was ebullent in his explanation of the device. "As you know, the neutrino transmitter we used before when we were contacted by Earth cannot be used again because of interference by intervening star systems. But Tachyons behave in a different manner. They even move at a different speed. Using the devices we constructed for neutrino transmission, but modifying them to receive and transmit tachyons we are now able to punch through any interference. Tachyons don't necessarily travel in Einstenian space, though, so it appears what we are seeing is from Earth's recent past. I believe we should even be able to interact with these scenes!"

Helena looked at the monitoring field within the framework. She could see city streets with pedestrians and automobiles. She had an intuitive feeling that this was somehow linked to the phenomena that she and John had experienced. "How long has this been working?" she asked.

There was a pause as everyone focused on her. The stares of her friends puzzled her, and she looked back at them , waiting for an answer. She realized that she did not recognize the fourth person in the room; a surprise since he was wearing a white sleeved uniform which indicated that he was a member of her own department!

"Who are you?" Tony blurted out finally.

Koenig had not noticed the stares that met Helena's question. He was inspecting the monitoring field. "Very funny, Tony," he said distractedly.

"John, you know we have a short list of people allowed in the labs," Tony began cautiously, realizing his Commander had obviously brought the lady in question with him. "She doesn't even have an ID badge." He turned toward her and said politely, "I don't think I've ever met you before."

"If this is one of your jokes, Tony, I'm not in the mood," Helena replied, paying more attention to the shifting scene in front of her. "Maya, are you recording this?"

Maya looked surprised. "Yes, we are. I don't think we've met." She spoke the last deliberately and carefully. Koenig turned at the tone of her voice and looked at her, then at Helena. Maya was known to enjoy a practical joke, but he didn't think she was joking this time.

Seeing his friend's startled look brought Victor back from his scientific reverie. "Maya, Tony, I'm sure the Commander has a good reason for bringing her here. John, why don't you introduce us." Victor gave Helena a polite friendly smile that scared Helena. It held none of the warmth he reserved for old friends.

Koenig stepped closer to Helena and put his hands on her shoulders, giving her a reassuring squeeze. "All right, I knew you would probably tease me for piloting Helena's Eagle this morning, but I'm concerned about what happened out there and I'm not in the mood for jokes."

A silence fell over the room, then Tony cleared his throat. "John, you took an Eagle out alone this morning. I walked with you to the launchpad. Don't you remember? We argued about waiting until Dr. Polhamus could go with you."

"Who is Dr. Polhamus?"

Victor smiled and looked toward the man sitting next to Maya, a portly, mostly balding man wearing a standard blue jacket and the white collar of the Medical Department. Helena didn't recognize him. She was sure that this stranger was not a part of her staff. Victor said, "After all these years I thought you would recognize your Chief Medical Officer, John."

The indicated medical officer was studying Helena with the same lack of recognition that Helena felt for him. Koenig nearly burst with impatience. "That's ridiculous, Helena is my Chief Medical Officer!"

"I believe we do have a problem," Dr. Polhamus said with an Eastern European accent. "Sandra informed us of the phenomenon aboard the Eagle. Did you both experience the same disorientation? And when did it occur, precisely?"

Helena was glad she was leaning against Koenig. They had once again become embroiled in the unimaginable, and she was thankful to have his support. "It was about 17:40. I felt it first, then John. It lasted only a minute or so."

Maya called up data on the computer. "We had been observing the field for several hours at that time. We've recorded hundreds, maybe thousands of images. They change rapidly." She indicated the screen which was now showing a wheat field and harvesting equipment. It changed as they watched to a small town's main street. "I can't see how it could have effected you in any way."

"I want you to turn it off now." Koenig stated with authority. "Then we can find out what happened. Victor, any ideas?"

"I'm going to need more information first, John. Would you mind answering some questions Doctor..."

"Russell," Helena answered. "Helena Russell. Yes, I'll be glad to answer any questions you may have."

Professor Bergman guided her to a nearby table. Koenig took up a position next to her and the others joined them. With Victor leading the discussion, a picture of the day's events began to emerge. As the team in the lab had observed events on Earth, something must have occurred to prevent Helena's presence on Moonbase Alpha.

"But we didn't do anything," Maya had objected.

"Perhaps that was enough," Dr. Polhamus suggested. "By observing and not acting, we changed an event which had a direct effect on Dr. Russell's life."

"Then how was the Commander effected? He remembers her, and not you, Doc," Verdesschi asked.

Victor responded. "It is most likely that this is not the John Koenig you spoke to this morning prior to his Eagle flight. Think of time as a set of dimensions that branches in an infinite set of directions. He could also be from the same time stream as Dr. Russell. It seems that Dr. Russell slipped from her time stream into ours, and this John Koenig was drawn with her. Our own Commander may be displaced as well. John, when you saw Dr. Russell was in pain, did you touch her?"

Koenig exchanged a glance with Helena and took her hand. The two of them had lived together on Alpha for years, but had always kept their personal life as private as possible. He met Victor's eyes and smiled, thinking that their friends on their own Alpha would have teased him a great deal for volunteering to pilot the Eagle today in order to gain some private time with Helena, and wishing that were true here. "Yes, Victor, we were touching when it happened. I felt the pain almost at the same instant she did."

"You were holding hands?" Maya asked.

"We were making love." Koenig replied in a tone that brooked no arguments or additional questions on that subject.

The others looked surprised, but hid it quickly behind poker faces. Dr. Polhamus spoke first and Helena noticed that his look was more approving and amused than surprised. "I expect that intense physical contact could have brought you both through into our time line instead of only Dr. Russell. Your presence then displaced our own Commander."

"How do we get home then?" Helena asked.

"The first thing we must do is find the event which caused the change between the time lines. Then we must determine how to act upon it to bring your time line into existence." Victor responded.

The task seemed overwhelming to Helena. "Where do we begin?"

Koenig had not let go of her hand. He could tell she was frightened by this, even though her outward appearance radiated a calm he did not share. "Start with a computer search. Maya, see if you can find any record of Helena in our data banks. Maybe she was involved in the space program, but not assigned to Alpha for one reason or another. Victor, have Kano begin checking the data you've recorded to identify those scenes."

Maya nodded and beckoned for Helena to accompany her to the computer console for searchable data. Dr. Polhamus spoke up. "Once you have begun the search, Commander, I believe you and the doctor should allow me to make sure there was no permanent damage caused by this phenomena."

Koenig was about to protest and Polhamus was looking stubborn, and ready to argue the point, but Helena put a restraining hand on Koenig's shoulder and nodded her agreement to the other doctor's request. Koenig stopped before starting his refusal and changed his remark to, "Certainly, Doctor, we'll join you in Medical Center as soon as possible." The nonverbal communication between the two was noted by the others as further indication that this commander was not their Commander. They had all been braced for another argument between the Commander and the CMO regarding the Commander's welfare. Koenig never had the patience to submit to medical scrutiny and usually argued against unnecessary exams. Dr. Polhamus accepted his unexpectedly quick victory with aplomb and made a quick exit with a bemused smile.

After a quick visit to Medical Center, they were pronounced fit and admonished to get some rest. Koenig could tell that Helena was under a great deal of strain around her co-workers and friends who no longer remembered her, and he ushered her out of the Medical Center as quickly as possible. Helena was not the type to easily allow others to see her emotions and Koenig knew the tight control she was keeping on her fears. It was late in the third shift by the time they arrived in their quarters. They both noticed that the name plate on the door held only his name, but had expected that. Helena was quietly relieved that no one else's name was on the plate with his. As soon as the door slid shut behind them, he turned to her and pulled her into a comforting embrace. She sighed and closed her eyes, head against his chest, wanting to pretend, if only for a minute, that everything was normal. They stood together for several minutes, enjoying the quiet and solitude. Finally Koenig pulled away, kissing Helena gently first. "You need some sleep, we both do."

Helena nodded agreement and the two turned toward the sleeping area of the quarters. They took one step forward, then stopped, looking in amazement at the furnishings. There was only a small single bed pushed into the corner of the room, not the large double bed they had shared for several years. Helena closed her eyes again, trying to maintain control over her emotions. "I want to go home," she said softly in a tense voice.

Koenig sighed and nodded agreement. "Come on, it's only for one night. If we have to stay any longer, I'll have maintenance find us a larger bed. I could take the sofa, if you want."

"No," she shook her head. "I don't want you that far away." They prepared for sleep and curled up together on the narrow bed, both asleep moments after their heads hit the pillow they shared.

She woke the next morning near the middle of first shift. She was alone, but there was a note on a piece of plastic that served as a notepad. It said, "Sleep as late as you wish, then join me in the lab. Love you, J." She smiled at the note and got up to head for the shower. Then she remembered that she had no clothing but the jumpsuit she had worn yesterday and frowned, wondering what to do. Before she could decide the doorbell buzzed for her attention. She hastily pulled one of John's robes from the closet and checked the commpost to see who was there. It was Dr. Polhamus, carrying a bundle of some kind. She used the comm post to allow him entrance. "Good morning, Dr. Polhamus."

"Good morning, good morning. Please, call me Pole, most of my friends do." At her smile and nod he continued, "I saw the Commander earlier this morning and he asked me to get you a few things: a change of uniform, a commlock, and an ID badge."

"Thank you, Pole." Helena accepted the bundle with a smile.

Pole glanced at the sleeping area. "He also mentioned the bed. Maintenance will be in to replace it this afternoon."

"John expects us to be here a while, then?"

"He said he wanted to be prepared. We haven't made a lot of progress but he had several other ideas and had set several people to work on them. Why don't you get dressed and meet me in the cafeteria for some breakfast. I'll brief you on our progress."

Helena nodded. "Give me about 15 minutes. What kind of access do I have with my commlock?"

"The common areas, these quarters, Victor's labs, and Medical Center. You never know when an extra doctor will come in handy."

Helena smiled agreement as Pole let himself out. In fifteen minutes she had showered and changed into a familiar white sleeved uniform and was on her way to the cafeteria.

Progress had all been negative. Although one of the functions of Alpha's computer systems had been archiving public and private data, they had found no traces of Helena Susan Blythe Russell in any databases. The Space Commission's database had confirmed that Lee Russell was the Commander of the Astro 7 mission to Jupiter, his personal record listed him as unmarried. When Helena had asked about Will Bates, who had known her longer than anyone else on Alpha, he had been interviewed and had admitted that he had done some part-time work as an undergraduate engineering student for the designer of Alpha's life support system, but had never met Helena and the only other undergraduate to work on the project had been a young man who had been a transfer student from the University of Oklahoma. They had become good friends and the young man had died on the Space Dock at Breakaway.

Kano had searched Census Bureau records and the records of the old social Security Administration. He was attempting to build a device which could read in the IRS records which had long been stored on Alpha but never needed. All records prior to 1990 had been scanned and stored on optical disks which had almost immediately become obsolete. No one could read them, and no one wanted them, but the Lunar Commission was willing to archive them in a vacuum on the moon for a fee.

They spent the next several days identifying the images recorded from the neutrino device. It was a tedious process of looking at scenes which might include buildings, automobiles, dense foliage, animals. They checked the angles of shadows, positions of stars, licence tags on cars and signs on buildings to try to locate the scenes. David Kano, Sandra Benes, Dr. Polhamus and Helena worked hard analyzing the data in the scenes. Maya attempted to assist, but didn't know enough about Earth to be much help.

Helena leaned back in her chair and rubbed her eyes. It felt like she had sandpaper behind the eyelids. She had been concentrating so hard on the information on the screen in front of her she had forgotten to blink. Sandra stopped the recording and sighed. She glanced at Helena, then asked hesitantly, "How about lunch?"

"That sounds perfect," Helena replied with a smile. Sandra had been distant and formal all morning. It was hard for her to remember that neither Sandra nor any of the others had any memories of her.

They left the lab together and headed for the travel tube in silence. Helena sat and leaned forward as the tube started, twisting the ring on her right hand in a nervous gesture and trying to remind herself that the familiar woman next to her was a stranger.

Sandra watched the woman next to her surreptitiously, and finally worked up the courage to say something. The blond stranger looked so miserable. "This must be hard on you, knowing all of us better than we know you."

Helena smiled sadly, still looking at her ring. "It is."

"You called me Sahn a while ago -- " she hesitated, still not comfortable with this stranger. "My sister used to call me that, but no one else has in a long time."

The travel tube stopped, and the door opened. They stood and walked into an empty hall. "I'm sorry," Helena said. "I've called you that for some time."

"We are friends?"

"Yes -- we've been through a lot together. I'll try to remember not to call you that if it makes you uncomfortable."

Sandra shook her head and met Helena's eyes. "No, it is all right. I rather -- like it." They smiled at each other, then she continued. "When I left for university Sandra' sounded more professional. It just sort of stuck."

Helena nodded. Sandra had told her that before. They entered the cafeteria feeling much more comfortable with each other. They selected their food, fruit salad and fresh bread for Helena, stir fry and rice for Sandra, and sat at a table to continue their conversation.

"Some of us get together in the gym for an aerobics workout after first shift." Sandra told her. "Would you care to join us?"

"I'd like that," Helena responded, pleased. "I'll try to act like I've never met them when you introduce me," she said quietly with a smile.

"That would help," Sandra leaned forward. "The whole situation is a little strange."

There were things Helena would like to ask about the version of Alpha, and Sandra would be the one who would know the answers. She leaned forward to ask when someone else sat next to Sandra.

"You two should try to look at little less conspiratorial. Especially if you're about to gossip or exchange secrets."

"We were not --" Sandra started, then realized with a glance at Helena that they had both been about to satisfy their curiosity about certain things. She and Helena exchanged smiles and she began again. "Helena, this is Kate Goldburg. If there is gossip in thee air, she can smell it. Please join us Kate.

"Nice to meet you, Helena," Kate reached across the table to shake her hand. Helena had known Kate for years. She had been friend and confidant and chief provider of all the news that wasn't fit to print on Alpha since the moment she arrived.

"Its a pleasure, Kate. But we really hadn't been gossiping."

"Yet." Sandra concluded with a mischievous smile. "Helena is going to join us for aerobics tonight."

"Is she?" Kate raised an eyebrow in surprise. She looked Helena over carefully, then glanced at Sandra before turning toward her food. With a calculated casualness she added. "Melanie will be there, too."

"I know," Sandra said simply, concentrating on her own lunch.

"Melanie?" Helena asked. "The only Melanie she knew was a young woman from the metallurgic section of the technical department, and wondered what significance this had.

It was obvious that Kate was dying to tell her. "Melanie has been the Commander's latest."

"Oh?" Helena was as anxious to hear more as Kate was to tell her, but not willing to give her the satisfaction of letting her know that.

Sandra began before Kate could. "The Commander - well, before now, has never been serious about anyone, you understand."

"Melanie is just the current in a long line of hopefuls, but the minute any woman starts showing an attachment to him, she is politely but firmly replaced," Kate continued.

"It's not like he forces himself on anyone who is not interested, or not available. He is really a gentleman about it," Sandra defended him.

"I'm not trying to imply that. There's certainly plenty of women willing to enjoy the Commander's company. He has a reputation for being charming and entertaining and," Kate paused with a twinkle in her eye. "Terrific in bed."

Helena smiled, remembering the way he had awakened her that morning -- their first in the new double bed. She knew quite well that he was all those things Kate had mentioned, and wished she didn't blush quite so easily. Kate noted her reaction with amusement.

Sandra steered the conversation back in its original direction. "Anyway, Melanie has been getting a bit too attached."

"And knowing our Commander's behavior patterns," Kate added again with amusement. "We've been taking bets as to how much longer it would last anyway."

Kate looked past Helena and smiled again, and shortly after that Koenig slid into the seat next to Helena. "Do you ladies mind if I join you.?"

"Not at all, Commander," Sandra said with a smile.

Koenig took a bite of his sandwich and looked at Sandra. "Isn't this your day off?"

"Yes. I have been helping Helena in the lab."

"Sandra's been great." Helena said. "Could you do without her in Command Center for a while?"

Koenig frowned in mock disapproval. Then grinned at her. "I suppose so, if I must."

Helena leaned against his shoulder in a reflexive gesture of affection. "Thanks."

Kate and Sandra steered the conversation to more neutral topics as the four proceeded to eat their lunch. Both noted the fact that John leaned over Helena and ate the honeydew melon from her fruit salad without asking. When he tried to spear a strawberry, however, she slapped his hand and stopped the conversation in mid-sentence. "Don't you take any of my strawberries. Why don't you get your own fruit salad?"

"Because I always end up with half of yours," he said with a good natured grin. He put his fork down and gathered up his tray. "Dinner tonight?" he asked.

"I'm going to the gym with Sahn and Kate after first shift. I expect we'll eat afterwards."

Koenig nodded easily. "I'll see you later tonight, then." He leaned down and kissed her forehead, nodded to the others and left.

Kate watched the exchange with interest. Helena could tell that Kate was changing some of the opinions she had formed about her already. Helena felt like laughing. "I live with him, Kate. That doesn't mean he owns me."

They both laughed. Kate decided she liked this new acquaintance. "I begin to see that all those hopefuls for the Commander's favor were a little too willing. They don't stand a chance."

It was late on the third day, and Maya was sitting next to Helena watching a pastoral scene, a meadow with a brook running through it, a conifer forest in the background. As the two women watched, a girl on a black horse galloped across the meadow and into the woods.

"What a beautiful animal. What is it?" Maya asked.

"A horse," Helena explained with a smile. "They were once used as transportation, but as our technology progressed, were ridden mostly for recreation." She stopped the tape and began to examine the scene.

"It looks like fun." Maya said wistfully. "There weren't any native animals left on Psychon when I was growing up."

"It is a lot of fun," Helena replied. "But you had to know what you were doing. I used to have a horse like that one when I was a girl. She had a mind of her own and would sometimes take me under branches or over logs I wasn't ready for. I took my share of spills..."

She broke off, staring at the scene before her. "Can you run that back and magnify the horse, Maya?"

"Certainly. What is it?" Maya clicked on the image and sped through the scene in search of the best view of horse and rider. She enlarged the area around the horse, then framed the horse's head. Helena studied the picture a moment, then pulled her commlock and punched a familiar code. "John, I've got something."

Koenig's face had appeared in the small screen. He nodded once, replied, "Be right there," and disconnected.

Helena asked Maya to enhance the image of the girl on the horse. The child was about 11 years old with blonde hair pulled into two tight braids. She wore a brightly colored striped t-shirt of orange and yellow, and white jeans that flared over riding boots. Helena shuddered visibly.

Maya noticed. "What is it Helena?"

"Call the others," Helena advised. "I'll tell you all at once." She moved to another computer terminal and began a series of searches. Kano was one of the first to arrive and he stood behind Helena watching her fingers fly over the keyboard, then drum lightly while she waited for a reply.

Koenig arrived with Bergman and Polhamus, radiating eagerness and impatience. Helena gave him a nervous smile and indicated the other screen. "That's me at age 11." Koenig and the others scrutinized the photo.

"You took that from one of the scenes we observed?"

Helena nodded. "Zoom back, Maya and play it through for them."

Maya did so and they all watched the girl ride across the meadow and disappear into the trees. Koenig looked at Helena for further explanation.

"That's my horse, Nightmare. My father accepted her as payment for delivering a baby. He did things like that frequently when his patients couldn't afford to pay. She was a beautiful mare, but Dad didn't know she was only green broke when he accepted her. He gave her to me and I rode her for years. I adored her. She had little training and I had less. She threw me occasionally and once she nearly killed me."

"You can't be sure that's really you, Helena. It could be any black horse."

Helena shook her head. "She's my horse, John. I registered her myself with the AQHA. I had to draw her markings. I'd know her anywhere. One morning near the end of the sixth grade I missed the bus. Dad was out on a call and I decided to ride Nightmare to school. I wasn't supposed to, but I was late, and had a project due, and I took the quickest route down the mountain to school. I was wearing my new orange and yellow t-shirt and a pair of white bell bottoms. We went through that meadow, into the woods and jumped a log that we'd jumped before -- or started to. Nightmare shied and threw me right into a tree. I hit my head and was hurt really badly. If a couple of hikers hadn't found me, no one would have even known I was missing for hours, and might not have found me for days."

Victor asked, "What do you remember about the hikers?"

"Not much, I had a bad concussion. They got me home somehow and told my dad they'd found me when he got home around noon. They had administered some first aid. I have a hazy memory of someone talking to me. He had beautiful blue eyes." She shook her head, then looked at John with surprise. "They were your eyes, John, your blue eyes."

She went pale and Pole was immediately at her elbow, guiding her to a chair. Although none of these people had known her a few days ago, they had all become fond of her, and they had found their Commander a much more pleasant person with Helena at his side. Her thoughts were on that hiker, long ago. She remembered nothing more than looking into his eyes, some words of comfort she couldn't remember and the beginnings of a schoolgirl crush. Her heart had melted the first time John Koenig looked into her eyes. She knew quite well that she still could refuse him nothing when she looked into his eyes. "John, in this time line I died. Somehow, you were one of those hikers and you didn't find me."

John sat in the chair next to her and took her hands. She was trembling. "You're jumping to conclusions," he said quietly. "We didn't see her fall, we don't know she died---" Before he could continue, the computer station Helena had used to enter her searches beeped for attention.

Kano slid into the seat and read the data from the screen. "AQHA registry, My Favorite Night Mare' registered April 14, 1971, by initial owner, Helena S. Blythe of Etna California, Second owner purchased the horse in July of 1972."

"John," she said softly. "I kept that mare until I left for college, then I left her with a friend. We never transferred her ownership. She only had one owner."

Koenig looked to Victor and Maya. "We have to go back there. We have to change things back. How can we do it?"

Bergman sighed and ran his fingers through thinning hair. "This is all highly theoretical, John..."

Koenig shook his head impatiently. "I don't want excuses, Victor. I want answers."

Maya placed her hand on Victor's arm. "Give us 48 hours, Commander. I have a few ideas. But you must understand that we really can't promise you anything."

Koenig nodded reluctantly. This was new territory for his people. He understood that, but he felt an urgency to return to his own world, the one to which he and Helena belonged. "I'll expect your report in 48 hours." He turned to Helena who gave him a strained, faint smile. "Let's give them room to work, Helena. Why don't we go have some dinner."

Forty-five hours later, Koenig sat in his office just down the hall from Command Center. It was a small room, designed for function, not psychological dominance as his old office in Main Mission had been. The desk faced the wall which held a bank of computer screens, three of which currently held views of the lunar surface. The desk contained a keyboard and Koenig's crystal sculptures of the Earth and Moon which had somehow, during all their travels, miraculously avoided destruction. Two chairs and a low table occupied the opposite wall. In the office Koenig was used to, a photo of himself and Helena graced the table. Paul Morrow had taken the photo during the brief time the Moon had held an atmosphere as they passed the planet Ariel. It was a good picture of the pair, both smiling and relaxed. Koenig's arms were around Helena's waist as they looked past the camera, watching the first and only beach volleyball game to occur on the lunar surface. Koenig missed the photo. It was another of the small but tangible differences between this Moonbase and his own. He had stayed away from the lab for the last two days, and used the time to keep up with the daily routine of work on the moonbase.

Two nights ago, he'd spent his evening comforting a distraught Helena. Although she hated to expose her emotional side in the presence of others, even himself, the enormity of their situation overwhelmed her, and she had cried herself to sleep in his arms. He knew that even if they were able to return to Earth, she would still be on an emotional roller coaster, dealing with the child's accident, which she had only hazy recollections of, seeing her home and seeing her father, alive again after witnessing his death while she was still a pre-med student. He found it unusual to be the one to provide the emotional balance, the calming influence, needed to deal with the situation. He was usually the more impatient, impulsive and emotional one of the couple. He would do whatever it took to help her, and return them to their own home. He just hated the waiting, and wished there was something he could do.

Yesterday, Helena had regained her composure and was willing to discuss the facts she could remember about her fall from the horse, and make some plans regarding what they would be able to do to help the child. Dr. Polhamus had been extremely helpful. Koenig left the medical side to the experts, relieved to have Helena more like her usual self. He had spent some of his time in the office exploring the differences in these diverging time lines. Some of the changes surprised him. Tony Cellini had been at the Centauri Space Dock at Breakaway, and had not survived to confront his monsters again in deep space. Three people had died when Alpha had met up with that graveyard of spaceships. Jackie Crawford, Alpha's first, and so far only, child had been killed with his mother Jennifer when the alien Jarek had attempted to seize the base. Although Jarek's people had prevented any additional deaths, Jarek had apparently seen no need to restore Jennifer and Jackie to their previous condition. Commissioner Simmonds had died at Breakaway. He had fallen awkwardly when the G-forces hit, and broken his neck. Captain Zantor's crew of six had visited Alpha briefly, and all six had left together. Luke Ferro and Anna Davis had killed two people in order to steal the supplies they needed on Arkadia, instead of using Helena as a hostage.

His commlock buzzed and he noted that Victor waited on the other side of the door. Koenig allowed him entrance and motioned for him to take a seat. Victor's solemn demeanor lead Koenig to draw certain conclusions regarding his visit.

"Victor, I take it the news is not good?"

Bergman sighed and passed his hand along the side of his head. "No, it's not, John. You know, the two of you are more than welcome here."

Koenig shook his head. "And what about our own home, Victor? Our friends must think we're dead."

"It could very well turn out that way. This could be extremely dangerous. It's completely untested."

Eyes narrowing, Koenig realized the truth. "You can do it can't you? You can send us back."

Bergman looked at the floor. "Yes, we can do it. However, we have no way to recall you -- or even learn if you are successful."

Koenig looked at the table which should have held Helena's picture, then back at the computer log, still displayed on the screen. Helena's presence had saved lives and he wanted very much to return to their own time line. He stood and began to prowl the small office like a caged animal. "Victor, I believe we must try this."

Victor looked up. "She could go by herself. You don't have to go with her. Alpha needs you, John."

Koenig was shocked. For a moment he was speechless. He stopped pacing and leaned against his desk, gripping the edge until his knuckles turned white. He looked at the low table which held a stack of files instead of her picture and reminded himself that Victor did not know Helena, and her friend would never have suggested that. "Do you remember when I lost Jean?" he asked in a distant voice.

"Yes, quite well," Victor replied, puzzled, but concerned. He remembered the grief his friend had felt, how he'd thrown himself into his work to forget.

He looked at Victor with cold blue eyes. "Helena brought me back to life. She is my life. I would do absolutely anything for her; destroy this base if I had to. I will not send her away and have her face this alone. That's final-- no discussion." Koenig knew he'd never admitted this out loud before; to himself, to Helena, to anyone. She was his strength, and his vulnerability. He hoped now his trust in his friend had not been misplaced.

"Victor, if this works -- if you can successfully send us back -- then you have to try to find a time as close to Breakaway as possible and take everyone else home."

"But John, that could cause a paradox."

Koenig began to pace again. The small room was unable to give sufficient space for the pent-up energy he needed to expend.

"Paradox be damned. We're already dealing with one. Find a likely place. Take everyone through, and stay out of sight until after Breakaway. Then let the Lunar Commission know where you are."

"It sounds like you won't be there."

"I won't. If we succeed, we should be in our own time line. There may be a chance to find our way back home. If not, we'll stay where we are." Koenig smiled ruefully. "I'll look you up in twenty-eight years."

Victor stood and looked his old friend in the eye, a man he had known for years, who was suddenly a stranger. This man belonged to a different world. "I hope you make it home," he said solemnly, offering his hand.

Koenig took his hand with a nod of thanks. "Helena and I will be together. We'll be fine."

"Come to the lab, I'll show you what we have. We can set a team to work finding the best spot for the rest of us."

Three days later, dressed in borrowed Levi's and flannel jackets and sporting mylar backpacks hastily painted olive drab in an attempt to make them look like military surplus, Koenig and Russell said their goodbyes and stepped into the spring of 1971. The backpacks carried medical gear, some survival rations and camping equipment. The Supply section had also been able to provide about $100 in pre 1971 American bills and coins. Victor had handed him five $20 gold pieces that could be sold to a coin collector when they were able to reach a city.

They stood on the edge of a small meadow. A line of trees and bushes on the other side of the grassy area marked a small creek. Behind them were tall sugar pines. A slight breeze stirring them to produce a sound like far-off surf. The air was pungent with the scent of growing things and was so totally different from their last breath of continually scrubbed Alphan air that it nearly took their breath away. They heard the horse's puffing breath, and the creak of leather harness before they heard the hoofbeats. Helena took his hand and leaned back into the shadow of the pines as the child approached on the galloping horse. As the horse vaulted the stream with ease and moved into the woods, Helena followed with John close behind. They crossed the stream on polished stones, Helena choosing her footholds with surety and Koenig following her lead more apprehensively. As he stepped onto dry ground he heard a child scream ahead of them and they ran faster.

She lay in a heap at the foot of a pine tree, another tree lay fallen across the path. The horse was still shying when they approached, and the child lay very still. Helena slowed, and after one glance at the girl spread on the ground, concentrated on calming the horse. She moved slowly toward the excited animal, talking softly and maintaining eye contact.

Koenig was completely out of his element here. City-bred, he knew nothing of horses and he knew enough about head injuries to know that Helena needed to be the first to touch the injured child. He chose to move towards the child. Before he could reach her, the undergrowth nearby parted with enough creaks and growls that he was positive they were about to be attacked by a herd of wild bears.

A large red setter leapt between Koenig and the child. Its teeth bared, it growled, barked, then growled again. Koenig froze, certain the dog would attack any second. Helena was suddenly at his side, placing worn leather reins in his hand. "Sirius, down." She commanded the dog in a stern voice, expecting to be obeyed. A hand signal accompanied the command.

To Koenig's surprise, the dog obeyed immediately, laying down with his head on his paws. He looked apologetically at Helena, then turned angry brown eyes on Koenig. Helena praised the dog and gave him a brief pat, then moved past him to the child. She pulled the pack from her back and pulled a medical scanner from the pocket of her jeans. She frowned at the readings and pulled an inflatable neck brace from her pack. Helena spoke as she worked. "She hit the tree with the back of her head. It's cracked the skull just behind the left ear. I'm not sure how much damage there is, but I can't possibly treat her here. Mount the horse and I'll hand her up to you."

Koenig glanced at the horse, almost surprised that he was still holding the reins. "Helena, I've never --"

"Just put your foot in the stirrup and pull yourself up. You've seen them do it in the movies."

In the movies the horse wasn't backing away, and hadn't just thrown a child to what could be her death. Koenig was not a small man, and the saddle seat was at his shoulder level. This beast looked no more friendly than the animal who lay between him and Helena growling deep in his throat. He started to protest again, but could tell that Helena was in no mood to be sympathetic or understanding. He backed up to stand by the saddle, an ornately tooled creation made of darkly aged leather. It was smooth and well-worn and obviously well cared for.

The stirrup was extremely high. He didn't think he could even reach it with his left foot at first. It didn't occur to him that the stirrup could be adjusted from its current height, set for a little girl nearly 18 inches smaller than himself. He managed to stretch up to the stirrup, then push off with his other toe to haul himself laboriously up onto the beast. He was sure he didn't look nearly as graceful as John Wayne, or Matt Dillon, but he managed to sit in the seat and not fall off the other side. The rocky ground looked a long way down and he held on to the saddle horn to maintain his balance. He was sure he would choose to be strapped to any of the rockets of early space travel and shot into space rather than be sitting atop this creature.

Helena stood at his left knee which seemed to be extremely high. With his feet in the short stirrups it seemed as if he were crouching above the horse. She held the girl in her arms. A bandage covered the back of her head with the neck brace helping to hold it in place. Helena's face appeared grey with worry. He carefully reached down for the child, uneasily balanced and terrified of falling.

She weighed next to nothing and was limp as a rag doll. He shifted to a position where he could hold her steadily while clinging to the saddle. Helena held the forgotten reins, and with the large red dog at her side, let the horse with its passengers back up the mountain.

As they rode, Koenig looked into the face of the girl-child who would, given a chance, grow into the woman he loved. The blonde hair was sunbleached to an almost white blonde. The skin was fair with a scattering of freckles across the bridge of her nose. Koenig had noticed that those freckles made a re-appearance on the few occasions when Helena had spent a few days in the sunlight. The high cheekbones and profile showed the promise of the woman's strong classic beauty. She opened wide green eyes and looked up at him.

"Lie still," he said, comforting her with a smile. "You've had a fall, and we're taking you home."

Her green eyes searched the depths of his blue eyes, then she gave a slight smile and relaxed against him, her eyes closing again.

They came upon a winding gravel road lined with tall sugar pines. Helena turned up hill and followed the road, quickening her pace. The horse continued its swaying gait, and Koenig did his best to keep the girl cushioned against the motion. In another ten minutes they entered a clearing at the top of a ridge. To their right was a small barn and corral. To the left was a large wooden house with a weathered deck on the front. The house was built about five feet off the ground in the front, but as the land rose behind it the sturdy building appeared to be built into the side of the mountain. Ahead was a breathtaking view of a lush valley in the distance and another emerald green mountain range beyond. The yard seemed to have been cleared of trees in order to allow the best possible view of the valley below. Helena tied the horse to the railing of the deck and reached under the stair with certainty. She retrieved a house key and unlocked the door that opened onto the deck. There was another door on the other side of a bay window which was to the left of the now unlocked door, both steps and a ramp led to that door which Koenig would soon find gave access to Dr. Blythe's waiting room and office.

He handed the child down to Helena, then prepared to climb down himself. As he swung his leg over the horse and reached the ground he felt muscles contract in protest. He considered himself to be in good shape, exercising regularly in the gym but his thigh muscles, and areas of his back side where he had not even known muscles existed began to stiffen from the twenty minutes of horseback riding by a tense and inexperienced rider. By the time he could move away from the horse, Helena had already disappeared through the open doorway. He followed.

He entered a sparsely furnished living room with polished hardwood floors and paneled walls covered will bookshelves. The wall across from the door was dominated by a stone fireplace. Bookshelves flanked the fireplace, with a desk built in to the far right of the wall. A hallway by the desk led to darkened rooms. To his immediate right was a picture window that looked onto the deck. A curved sectional sofa occupied the space under the window and against the wall to the right. Two leather chairs sat close to the fireplace with a handmade throw-rug between them. The dog, Sirius, had curled up on the hearth rug and growled again as he and Koenig exchanged a look.

To Koenig's left was a door into a kitchen. The bay window at the front of the kitchen held a dining table and chairs. The kitchen was small, but neat and conveniently laid out. Directly across from the door into the kitchen was another doorway. A light was on, and the room held a mismatched selection of wooden and plastic chairs with vinyl cushions. It looked like the waiting room that it was. Koenig walked into that room and found another open door in the wall to his right. The big bright florescent lights of an examining room glared from the doorway.

Helena had laid the child on the examining table and was talking on the telephone. "Yes, that's right, I'm at Dr. Blythe's residence and he's not here. There's been an accident. His daughter has been hurt.... I understand that, but this is an emergency... Yes, you'll need to get a deputy out to him right away... A head injury... very serious, yes. ... No, I won't leave until he gets here... Thank you."

She hung up with an annoyed look on her face. "I never liked that woman from the answering service."

"Will the message get through?"

"I hope so."

Helena didn't waste any more time worrying about finding her father. She began preparations for surgery, giving John patient detailed instructions on how to help. As he helped her scrub she looked him in the eyes. "You've never done anything like this before, but I can't do this alone. Will you be all right?"

He smiled, trying to lighten the mood, "I'll do anything, as long as I don't have to ride a horse again."

She gave him the briefest flash of a smile. "No horses in the operating room." She began to hook up the tiny diagnostic equipment she had brought along. "These are smart devices, they'll let us know if something is wrong with her vitals. I also brought along an electronic anesthetic device so we wouldn't have to use drugs."

"What if your father shows up while we're using them?"

"Then we're med-tech design professors from MIT who were out here at a conference and doing some backpacking before returning back east with our experimental devices."

"With experimental technology in our backpacks?"

"They're supposed to be portable, we're testing them." She continued her preparations while she talked.

"Very good," he complimented, impressed.

"It was Pole's idea. I thought it worked well." She paused, "I liked him."

"I thought you two got along well together. Should I be jealous?'

Her laugh was brief. "As a colleague. I like my lovers taller."

Koenig grinned. "I'm glad I qualify."

She looked up at him briefly, her eyes completely serious. "You qualify in every way." Then she became the consummate professional, all attention on the problem at hand. She tried to be patient with him, explaining in detail what she needed him to do, but he still felt clumsy and woefully inadequate to the task. It was not a familiar feeling to him.

She proceeded with painstaking caution, checking the child's vitals constantly. To Koenig, it felt like an eternity. He heard a door slam and then another as Dr. Richard Blythe entered the surgery and asked for a status on his daughter, the patient.

Helena quickly gave him believable credentials for herself and Koenig, informed him of the accident and all that had transpired. When she began describing the child's condition it seemed that she and Dr. Blythe slipped into a different language. Koenig was relieved to be able to stand back and allow Dr. Blythe to take a more active role in the operation. He remained close by to follow any instruction Helena gave him, but was happy to allow someone with more expertise to assist her.

Richard Blythe was a large man. As tall as Koenig, with broad shoulders and wiry red hair. He wore a plain white business shirt and a narrow black tie, outdated in 1971. A stethoscope had been around his neck and tucked into his pocket. His green eyes were much like his daughter's, although the resemblance ended there. His features were harsher, his nose larger, his skin darkly tanned, not the usual complexion of a red-head. He was not a handsome person, although he had a self confident demeanor that added attraction. He was a man you could place your confidence in, depend on, trust. Koenig noticed that he rubbed his fingers together nervously in the same manner as his daughter when she was under stress.

The child's vital signs grew erratic during the operation. Despite the quick treatment, the damage was too close to the portion of her brain governing autonomic functions. The trauma was causing swelling that continued to worsen despite the efforts of two talented doctors. Both doctors were very detached, very professional, and knew they were losing their patient.

"We need a respirator." Helena commented as she checked the vitals.

"I don't have one. The closest is forty miles away in Yreka."

"Too far, there's no time."

"I know," Dr. Blythe agreed with a sigh. "Even if we had it, her heart rate is so erratic it wouldn't matter."

Helena nodded in solemn agreement.

Koenig watched the two with growing restlessness. How could the two of them possibly stand there so calmly while the child slipped away? Over the years he had known Helena he had become almost used to her detached manner when dealing with patients. Once he knew her well enough to see her personal side and realized how much she agonized over each person in her care, it had been easier to see that the coldness in her demeanor under pressure was just a facade. She kept her emotions under tight control until she had the luxury of time to deal with them. They had been in numerous situations where this had worked to their advantage. Koenig now saw where she had gotten this trait from. Her father stood next to her calmly discussing the child's imminent death. The two doctors did everything possible to save the child, but were unable to delay the inevitable.

As the life signs slowly decreased, Helena quietly removed the equipment she had been using and caught Koenig's eye, motioning for him to leave the room. He exited with relief, and Helena joined him in the waiting room shortly. She looked exhausted and discouraged. He crossed the room to her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"You need some rest."

She leaned against his hands, her hands touching his elbow. "We need to leave, now."

"Surely he won't mind if we stay a little while --" Koenig began, indicating the man in the room next door alone with his daughter's body.

Helena shook her head. "He won't, I've proven my skill to him. But others will be here soon who will ask more questions. We need to be on our way by then."

"What others?" Koenig asked, immediately thinking of coroners and police.

"Relatives, friends," she picked up her backpack and looked around quickly, making sure she had left no futuristic equipment behind. She headed for the door trusting that Koenig would follow. He did. "My aunt just lives down the mountain. She'll have heard about this by now. There'll be aunts, cousins and other relatives here soon. My great uncle is the sheriff. A cousin is pastor of the church in Etna. Our family has been here for generations. Hardly anyone ever leaves, and it's not an area where people move to. We know everyone here. Right now, I'd really like to make sure I don't see them."

"Won't they notice us on the road?" Koenig asked as they exited the house and drew on their packs. He felt extremely conspicuous standing in the driveway wearing a backpack. To his surprised she turned away from the driveway, toward the valley and mountains beyond.

"We'll take the Trail. There won't be too many people on it this time of year, but there will be some."

"What trail?" He asked, hurrying to catch up as she set a brisk pace.

"The Pacific Crest Trail passes right by here. By the eighties we could take it all the way to Mexico without touching a road but parts aren't finished yet. It uses some forest roads and highways. We can walk it to the interstate, or even almost to Nevada if we want to."

She plunged down the hill, looking neither right or left, confident of her destination and that John would follow her. As a psychologist she made a self-diagnosis: denial. The rest of her mind agreed -- damned right it was denial. It seems the only coping mechanism left to her. She certainly couldn't use sublimation, there was nothing else to concentrate on. Her world, her life, had shattered in this bizarre situation. How could she have failed? How could she exist? After all the times she had thought about her father and the things she had wanted to say to him, share with him, how could she just walk away and leave him to his grief? Her mind fought back. This was not her world, she had not died back there, and her father had never gone through this grief of losing a child. She thought of the last time she had seen him alive, lying on the kitchen floor, while she performed CPR. That last look he had given her before he had slipped, irretrievably away. A look of love and pride, as he accepted his fate calmly and said a wordless goodbye to his well-loved daughter. It was a look she remembered and which had sustained her through numerous dark times in her life. Who would be there to hold her father's hand and say goodbye this time? Denial was definately the best coping mechanism for this situation. She pushed these thoughts to the back of her mind as John caught up with her and slipped his hand into hers.

Sensing her mood, he asked, "So what kind of hiking trail is this?"

She told John a little about the trail, a western version of the Appalachian Trail, the PCT ran from the Mexican border to Canada through deserts and valleys and across mountain ranges. As a girl she had hiked and ridden the trail both alone and with her scout troop. Just south of her home the trail turned away from the Coast Range and headed west past Mount Shasta and into the Cascades. They entered the trees at the other side of the meadow and came across a gravel pathway that seemed to wind up around the mountain away from her father's house. They climbed steadily. Helena altered the pace a bit, knowing that neither of them had lately had much experience walking long distances.

Marble cliffs towered above them. Huge pine cones, larger than footballs, littered the forest floor. It was late afternoon. They turned a corner on the trail, and before them spread a beautiful valley with one huge snow-capped mountain dominating the horizon. They stopped. Helena smiled tiredly, taking in the familiar sight. Koenig marveled at the view. A campsite area had been cleared next to the trail here with a view of the mountain. "Why don't we stop here?" Koenig asked.

Helena nodded and sank wearily on the picnic bench. Koenig helped her remove her backpack and shed his own. He set up their small tent and let Helena have some time alone with her thoughts.

Helena's mind wandered in several directions at once while she tried to make sense of the events of the past week. Koenig sat down across from her and handed her a mylar wrapped ration bar from his backpack. She touched the wrapper thoughtfully, an oddity here in the early seventies, common in the nineties and on Alpha in whatever year it had been when they left. Her thoughts weren't focused enough to remember the year or how many days they had been in space since Breakaway. The meaning of time was blurry for her in this now she occupied. Around her, time seemed to move without her, birds chirped in the trees, a soft breeze blew clouds through the sky, alternating patterns of sun and shade on their picnic table. The air smelled of green growing things. It was all so different from her concept of home, Alpha, and she didn't truly feel a part of it.

"So, where would you like to go?" John asked, pulling her from her reverie as he took a bite of his own ration bar. "We are, right now, more free from obligations and goals than I've ever been in my life."

Helena watched him carefully, she saw no trace of rancor, only an open minded support for her and their current situation. Choosing one of the more whimsical thoughts that had been running through her head, she made a suggestion. "How about Paris?"

John's raised eyebrows indicated that was a possibility that had not occurred to him. She continued. "It would be interesting to watch the development of post modernist psychological theory, study with LeCan and Foucault. Turkle would be studying with them now. I would love to meet her as a young woman, watch her begin to develop her theories."

"I took a class with Dr. Turkle," Koenig replied with a smile. "I wish you'd been around to explain things to me then. I'd been out of college for years before I began to understand some of the ideas she expressed."

"I never had the opportunity to meet her, although we corresponded by e-mail while I worked in London and before we left Earth. Her concept of self has had a great influence on me. It's always amazed me when we've encountered things since Breakaway that some of her work seems to explain so clearly."

"Like the planet where we thought we were being attacked by Hawks?"

"Yes, and also the planet where we found Lee."

"Lee's avatar, perhaps? Used by an alien?" Koenig was always wary of discussing Helena's late husband. He was sensitive to Helena's feelings regarding the topic, and always felt a bit guilty over the jealousy he felt toward the dead astronaut. Still, he had always been skeptical of Helena's claim that the being they met was really her missing husband.

"It was more than that." Helena insisted. "It truly was Lee's self or at least a persona of his -- " She stopped herself. Elbow on the table, chin propped up with her hand, she smiled at John. "We've had this argument before."

He mirrored her position and reached his other hand across the table to link his fingers with hers. "At least it's a familiar argument, and it's at least allowed you to really smile at me for the first time in days."

She relaxed, only slightly, but that was all it took. Her smile turned to tears, and she put her face in her hands and sobbed. John was around the table in seconds, arms around her, offering her the strength she needed. The emergency was past and her world had dissolved. She leaned against the man she loved and cried, for herself, and her father, and the child she had been unable to save, and the life they had led that had vanished so completely. The sun set and Koenig held her until she could cry no more. Koenig supported her, and told her it would all work out. She didn't ask why, after all the things they had been through it was a meaningless question. The stars came out, and a full moon rose, as they sat together.

She was again amazed at the depth of their relationship. It was a bond which comforted, exhilarated and terrified. The need they shared for each other's presence had caused John to give up everything he had trained for all his life, and she knew that she would have done the same for him without a moment's hesitation. It was their strength, although it could also be their greatest weakness. She hoped the decision he had made didn't give him cause to hate her later as they watched the space program progress.

With the rising moon John broached a different subject. "It will take us a while to get to Paris on $100. Let's go to Las Vegas first."

"Are you planning on doing some gambling?"

"No, but I do intend to place some bets. While you were an eleven year old falling off of horses, I was a fourteen year old spending all my spare time at the ball field. I can tell you exactly who won every Mets game during the 1971 season, and the scores, and most of the other teams in the league as well. That should be pretty useful don't you think?"

"Quite useful," she replied, stifling a yawn.

The temperature was already dropping in the high altitude spring. Koenig led her to the tent and they wrapped up together in the thin but warm thermal blankets they had brought from Alpha. She fell immediately into an exhausted sleep and Koenig soon followed, dreaming of hiking trails and baseball diamonds.

Earth--September 30, 1999

Victor Bergman unlocked the door to his Boston apartment. A layer of dust covered everything. Five years of dust, he thought wearily. No, it had only been six months here, although he had been gone for five years. He still found it disorienting, but was relieved to be back home at last.

When John Koenig had shaken his hand and walked through the doorway into another time with the woman he loved, Bergman had felt the weight of command settle around his neck like a noose. John had left him in Command before, but it had always been briefly and temporarily. He had looked around at "his" command staff. All were grimly aware that Koenig would not be returning.

Command had never interested Victor Bergman. It involved too much attention to detail and much of that detail was extremely uninteresting. He would much rather be free to explore the minutiae of scientific problem than expand his sights to look at the broad effect the phenomena might have on the people around him and make plans for those effects.

Sandra Benes had appeared at his elbow and taken on the details of keeping Alpha functioning. He felt a bit like a fraud. Sandra had known more about the day to day functioning of Alpha than he did, and let him know what he should be doing, what decisions to make and kept him on task. She also found time to assist Pole and Tony Verdesschi in dating the scenes and choosing the place -- places actually-- for the Alphans to use to return home.

Bergman hoped he could persuade Sandra to assist, or even administrate a project to further study the effects of tachyon time field device. They had returned with the plans to this and many of the other experimental devices his lab teams had been working on. He flipped absently through a pile of mail as his mind leapt from sources of funding to the theory of neutrino transmission to relief that he no longer had to involve himself in the details of returning the Alphans home.

A plain envelope with a handwritten address caught his eye among the junk mail and bills. The handwriting was a familiar precise script. There was no return address. At the bottom of the envelope the word "PERSONAL" had been written in block letters. His heart, had it not been artificial, would have skipped a beat. The postmark was September 12, 1999. He sat slowly at his desk and opened the letter. Inside was a plain white sheet of paper. It read: "Victor, I hope everything has gone well with you. Please give me a call when you have a chance, John. (333)555-2309"

The letter was designed to allow Victor to know that John was here, on Earth, and safe. Victor was well aware that John was on Alpha on the 11th of September, but his older self, the one now listed as "missing" was here and waiting to hear from Victor. Had the Alphans not returned, the letter would have evoked no notice by whoever ended up cleaning out his apartment once the Alphans were declared dead.

He reached for the telephone and dialed the phone number. The phone number was in the United States, but he did not recognize the area code. The phone rang twice, then the receiver picked up and a child's voice answered, "Hello?"

He had not anticipated that someone besides John, or Helena, might answer the phone. He hesitated.

The child asked again, "Hello?"

"Hello there, is ..." he hesitated. John had not signed his last name. Was he using his own last name? "John..." He paused.

"Just a minute," the child's voice replied cheerily. The phone was dropped noisily, and footsteps could be heard running across a floor. A door slammed. Bergman sat, confused, until another voice was heard on the line as an extension was picked up.

"Hello?" Said a familiar woman's voice.

"Helena?" Victor asked, not knowing what else to ask.

"Victor! Welcome home!" Helena's response was warm and happy, "You got John's letter?"

"Yes, I did, cryptic as it was. I was a bit confused when a child answered the phone. Your -- daughter?" He did a quick calculation of how old she and Koenig should be. The answer surprised him.

Helena laughed in response. "Thank you for the compliment, but she's my granddaughter."

"Your granddaughter! Oh my, it doesn't seem possible. You and John are all right, then?"

"Fine. And we'd like to see you, when you have the time."

"As soon as possible. Helena, I listed John as missing.' Only a few people know the full circumstances. You were not on the roster at all."

"I know," she hesitated. "We were -- unsuccessful," she said with regret.

"I was afraid that might be the case. I have a theory about that --" he realized he was about to launch into a lecture by long distance. "But we can discuss that when I see you. Where are you?"

"You'll need to fly into Albuquerque. John will pick you up there."

He heard the clicking of computer keys. He had not been surprised that there had been no video transmission for the phone call. Private homes still rarely had video transmission. They were, however, obviously connected to the Internet.

"There's a flight from Boston leaving at 8 a.m. tomorrow. Can you catch it?"

"Certainly."

"Good, it's all reserved. Pick up the ticket at the check-in counter. Do you want a window seat?" she asked mischievously.

"If possible. I get the feeling you enjoy this."

She laughed, "Modern technology is wonderful the second time around."

Victor laughed with her. "It's good to be home."

"We're glad you're here. John has been worried sick that something would go wrong and you wouldn't get back."

"I was too. I'll see you tomorrow."

"We'll meet you at the airport."

Bergman abandoned his apartment again at dawn the next morning. The plane landed in New Mexico a little before noon local time. He was still wondering what he would find, and having a hard time accepting the fact that his younger friend was a grandfather.

A broad shouldered white haired man leaned casually against a barrier as Bergman exited the plane. A familiar lopsided grin split his face as he spotted Bergman. Despite the white hair, Bergman had no problem recognizing his old friend. He strode forward with a wave and a shout, "John!"

"Victor," Koenig took his hand firmly, then gestured toward the corridor. "It's great to see you."

"It's good to see you too. What happened when you left Alpha? I can't wait to hear how you've been-what you've been doing."

"Everyone from Alpha is all right?"

"Yes. We chose six spots that we could determine occurred during the past summer and sent everyone through in groups of 50. Pole, David, Paul, Alan, Tony and myself each took a group and we laid low until after the thirteenth. It all went quite smoothly, and everyone has now been sent home."

"Maya?"

"Headed for Italy with Tony. He asked her to marry him before we left Alpha. He did so quite publicly and she accepted. She was rather worried about coming to Earth, but Tony was doing everything he could to make her feel welcome and protected. He was quite solicitous of her feelings. I was impressed. As much as they tease each other, they're really very much in love."

Koenig smiled. "Good, I'm glad. You'll have to give Helena all the details. She'll enjoy that."

Bergman became aware that their leisurely pace through the airport was caused by Koenig's limp and use of and intricately carved cane that appeared more utilitarian than an affectation. "The cane--?" he began the question.

Koenig shrugged. "Arthritis. I just had a hip replaced and am not quite 100% yet. Helena can tell if I don't use it. It hasn't kept me from riding a horse every day."

"I didn't know you could ride."

"I couldn't, but I've learned," he said with a smile. "Helena likes to ride, and she taught me. We both decided to have fun in our second' life here. If it wasn't fun, we didn't do it."

"Well, I suppose given the circumstances, that's the best philosophy to take. What did you do?"

"She told you we weren't successful," Koenig started as he directed Victor through the parking lot to an orange Corvette. Victor had meant to ask why Helena had not accompanied him. Now that they were sliding into a two seater, he knew.

"Yes, I suspected that might be the case, but didn't have any data to back up my theory. I'll explain it to you and Helena together." He was anxious to hear about John's life.

"After we left her father's house, we went to Nevada, where I pawned your golden Eagles and placed bets on every baseball game I could."

Victor chuckled. During all the years he had known John, he had noticed that Koenig could never be too busy to follow the record of his beloved Mets.

"See, I always told you that baseball wasn't just a waste of time," Koenig grinned from behind the dark glasses he had donned against the glare of the autumn sun. "Once we had some funds to live on we went to Paris. Helena went back to school to get the credentials to match her skills, but she spent most of her time learning French. High school classes twenty years before weren't really adequate preparation for college level courses."

"I can't see you going back to school." Koenig had been impatient enough the first time he had gone to college.

"No, I got jobs as a free-lance pilot, nothing long-term or blatantly illegal, but risky enough to be well paying -- and fun. I just gave them the impression that I'd flown in Nam and they didn't ask any further questions. There were plenty of other pilots in the same situation -- Americans with a quiet aversion to flying into American airspace, but an itch to fly anything with wings or rotors." Koenig grinned, remembering. "I flew some incredible things, including some outrageously experimental birds at the Paris Air Show.

"Helena really flipped when she found out about the type of craft I was flying, but she got over it -- or kept her thoughts to herself. Then, after our son was born and I realized I didn't want to risk not seeing him grow up."

"A son?" Bergman said with a smile. Koenig had never shown an interest in parenthood, although his wife Jean had wanted a child.

"Helena had an implant, which we couldn't ask anyone to remove, since those things didn't exist yet. We never thought much about it, and figured we'd be too old when the implant wore off, but it turned out that we weren't!"

The Corvette had pulled out of the parking lot and Koenig easily maneuvered them onto the interstate highway, headed east. The miles flew by with a speed that made Bergman thankful that he could not see the speedometer. Koenig handled the car with practiced ease, passing the other cars like they were standing still.

"Rick was barely a year old when Vicki was born."

"Vicki?" Bergman asked with delight.

"Named for an absent friend. We would have asked your permission, but you weren't available."

"I'm honored, permission given."

"Only about twenty-three years too late, but happily accepted. We stayed in France until Vicki was about four, but were worried about the coming war. Europe would be so devastated and we really wanted to make sure we were well out of the way, so we came here."

"And where are we headed?"

"A ranch near Las Vegas, New Mexico. We own some land, and lease adjacent federal land to run cattle. Helena had a practice in Las Vegas until she decided to retire last year. Vicki and her husband Taylor run the ranch now. They both love the land and working with animals. They grew up together, his parents worked for us. They married right out of high school and have two kids. You talked to Rissa on the phone. She's the oldest. Taylor and Vicki have also managed to find time to earn ag degrees from the University of New Mexico."

"And your son?"

"Rick's an engineer, working at a big firm in San Francisco. He showed interest in space sciences when he was young, but Helena managed to discourage that. She didn't want any chance that he would be near Alpha or the Space Dock last month."

"Being in San Francisco was bad enough."

"We asked him to come home for a visit. We were very specific that he needed to be here that weekend. Of course he returned to California as soon as possible. His skills were needed."

"You had no problems here?"

"No, we chose our home carefully, with future events in mind. No fault lines nearby, sturdy construction. The children know nothing of our unusual -- past. No one does."

"It must have been hard on you."

Koenig shrugged. "At times. We have lived our lives in the present we found ourselves in. Sometimes it was hard on Helena, specially at first, having only me, and me being so set on flying every dangerous aircraft that came my way, but we managed to give each other some space to establish new identities and independence, and chose not to smother each other."

He smiled and looked at Victor. "It was worth it. For the most part, we've been happy together. We seemed to establish the right combination of separate and common interests, and it's been a good twenty-eight years. But I am looking forward to a really new baseball season next year."

Bergman laughed with him and they spent the rest of the trip filling in the details of their separate lives, anecdotes and incidents, and plans for the future.

It was late that evening when he had a chance to sit alone with Helena and John before a crackling fire in the fieldstone fireplace of their living room. Dinner had been a family affair. Vicki's family was lively and energetic and conversation was carried on in an appealing pastiche of English, French and Spanish. Rissa, the oldest grandchild was charmingly fluent in all three languages. Rico, her 2-year-old brother seemed equally fluent, although quieter than his sister. After dinner his namesake and her family had retired to their apartment off the large game room on the other side of the fireplace. The living room was decorated with southwestern style, massive wooden furniture and Navaho blankets and rugs dominated the room. Strategically placed clay jars held dried flower arrangements. Helena laughingly admitted to a complete lack of gardening skills, not even a cactus would survive her ministrations to house plants. Windows gave panoramic views of the west, south and east, and the high cedar-beamed ceiling lent to the impression of being outdoors at night.

Bergman sat close to the fire in a comfortable leather chair, nursing a brandy and wishing for a cigar. Koenig sat on the sofa facing the fire with his arm around Helena who curled next to him with a self-assured grace. Koenig absently caressed her golden hair.

v In the firelight she appeared to have aged very little. The years had been kind to the young woman Bergman had met a few months before. Her gold blonde hair shimmered in the firelight and her eyes still shone with an inner light when she looked at her husband.

Bergman explained some of his theory of what had occurred. "Just as every time we discover that the smallest particle is made of even smaller particles. The same seems to hold true on a macro scale. Our universe is part of something in space-time larger than itself. And various particles of this something may even occupy the same space we do."

"Like anti-matter." John suggested.

"Exactly, or a parallel continuum such as the one we met up with once where the moon was in orbit, and Earth devastated."

Helena and John both nodded and Helena reached for John's hand, remembering an unnerving autopsy on another John Koenig, and watching herself die.

"There may be many such parallel universes, some hardly different at all, others so alien to us we could be unable to survive. Each universe making up a piece of something much larger. What seems to have happened with the tachyon time scanner when we first turned it on is that it created an opening which allowed you two to slip from your universe into ours. It's most likely that several universes turned it on at once, creating a sort of tunnel and you slipped through the opening, displacing our John Koenig to another adjacent universe. In some of them, the John and Helena who were displaced may never have noticed a difference, tho only indication it happened may have been a momentary illness while aboard, completely unexplainable. But in your case --"

"In our case, there was a major difference," John finished. "At least for us personally."

"Victor nodded. "Exactly. In this universe, Helena was destined to die of a childhood accident. To prevent that would cause a paradox. Since a paradox cannot exist, you could not prevent it. In your own universe, Helena was saved as a child. From what you remember, Helena, it sounds like the Helena and John who displaced you in your universe went back and were successful."

"If the John Koenig from this universe slipped into a universe where I did exist --" Helena mused, full of compassion for the man she loved-- in any universe.

"It will depend on what kind of universe he arrives in. Perhaps it will be another universe where you do not exist, and he may not notice the difference. Or it could be a universe where another John Koenig exists."

"Will that cause any harm?" Koenig asked, remembering the other parallel Earth they had visited.

"I honestly don't know. We'll have to trust to our counterparts to deal with the consequences."

At sunrise the next morning, Koenig walked out onto the deck of his second floor bedroom. Helena sat on the floor of the deck, legs hanging over the edge, swinging over the patio below.

"I missed you," he said, eschewing the nearby chair to sit on the floor beside her. The sun was rising over the plains, tinging everything with the pink rosy glow which had given the Sangre de Cristo range its name.

She leaned back against the arm he'd put around her shoulders. Her forearms resting lightly on the railing of the deck. "I was thinking about those other universes. The one we left-- they may not have even missed us. What was their life like?"

They watched the sun rise, a red ball hovering on the horizon. "We'll never know. Using Victor's theory, duplicates from another adjacent universe could have replaced us, and no one knows the difference. Right now it's 1999." John said quietly. "It hasn't happened to them yet -- to us. They're still struggling with the aftermath of Breakaway, just beginning to know how nice it can be to stand by each other's side and watch the stars. When it happens to them, they'll have each other for comfort and support, whether it's a brief discomfort or a slip into an alien universe." He paused, then continued. "Do you wish we had lived our last twenty-eight years on Alpha?"

She thought of their time on Alpha. It included adventure and grief and risk and rewards and hope and dreadful shortages. She shook her head. "No, it wasn't the life we were meant to lead. As long as we're together --"

He smiled and kissed her cheek and finished her sentence, "We're home."

August 17, 1997